The whole weekend consisted of kissing, teasing, and more kissing. We went to the mall, took Henry to get some ice cream, then took him to the movies. That was it.
Sydney and I are hanging out today to kick off the break. She and I haven’t really talked a lot recently and that’s weird for us.
“So.” She took a drink of her milkshake and turned towards me more.
We’re in our spot. When nights would get rough when I was younger, we would walk here. When Syd got a car, we would drive and park right in front of the water. It’s so gorgeous as well. A tiny lake where all the upper middle class and higher live. Sydney lives here.
“So…” I stared at her, waiting for her to continue.
She stirred the vanilla drink and didn’t look at me, “Charlie and I have a date on Friday.”
“Charlie Croft?” I sat up straighter, “You’re joking, right?”
She rolled her eyes and fought the smile on her lips, “Nope. He asked me out on Friday.”
I hit her knee, “That’s awesome! When is it?”
Her smile grew, “Tomorrow. We’re going to Vala’s together. Their fall break sale is going on and ‘couples’ passes are 20 bucks.”
I nodded, “That’s cute. Vala’s is a really good first date, Syd. And Charlie Croft is so adorable.”
She nodded, “He’s really sweet too. Polite. He told me he’s liked me since sophomore year but never asked me out because I was dating Freddie off and on.” She shook her head, “If Charlie asked me out then, I would have said yes too.”
“Liar. Charlie Croft had a combover and square glasses and he hadn’t ever heard of deodorant in his life.”
She hit my leg, “I would have fixed him right up. He’s always had potential.”
I rolled my eyes and sucked in a breath from laughing so hard, “Yeah, yeah. Always seeing the best in people.”
“Speaking of seeing the best in people.” She took a sip of her drink again, “What’s up with you and ice queen?”
I glared at her and fought my blush furiously, “She’s not an ice queen actually. We’ve been getting close.” I shrugged, picking up my own drink, “She’s nice.”
She snorted, “She’s more than nice, you guys have been hanging out everyday for weeks.”
“It hasn’t been weeks.” Now my cheeks were on fire. There’s no way to hide this.
She shrugged, “It totally has. I’ve been wanting to ask about it but…” She looked away.
“You know I hate when you do that!” I slapped her leg, “But what?”
She glared at me, “But I was waiting until you weren’t busy.”
I leaned back and raised my eyebrows, “I haven’t been busy. Hockey. That’s the only busy thing I’ve been up to.”
She set her drink in the cupholder next to mine, “And Scarlett. You two have been hanging out a lot.”
“Yeah but that’s not- I always have time for you. And Yoda and Mo. But especially you.”
She looked towards the water, “Not for the past few weeks. Despite hockey, you’re not busy. We always do stuff. But then you and Scarlett started getting closer.” She shrugged, “I thought maybe she was taking my spot. Even when you’re not with her, all you do is talk about her.” She looked at me, “It started to seem like she was more important.”
I stared at her, letting the words sink in. Then, I put my hand on her knee, “Sydney Wyatt, you are my best friend. You are the most important person to me and that will never ever change. Remember rule 72?”
She raised her eyebrows, “How could I forget?” She cleared her throat, “Rule number 72: Never ever let a man…” She looked at me.
“Or a woman.”
“Come between us. Period.” She did the ‘X’ motion across her chest.
I copied her, “Boom.” I quickly took her hands in mine, “Nothing will ever come between us, Syd. You’re like, my literal sister. I love you too much to ever lose this.”
She looked away and sniffled. Then she looked back at me, “I love you, Nattie.”
I pulled her into a hug.
She started crying on my shoulder and I just rubbed her back.
She sniffled hard, “Sorry.” She pulled away, and offered me a smile, “I’m on my period.”
I groaned, “Great. You know ours always sync up.”
She nodded and wiped her eye on the bottom of her shirt, “Good luck with that.” She looked outside, “Wanna sit on the hood?”
“It’s cold?”
She pointed to the back seat, “You know I keep Gertie in the car with a couple of heaters this time of year.”
I turned around and sure enough, her portable heater sat in her back seat. It’s solar powered and made for camping in extreme weather. Syd bought her for Tucker Kent’s cabin parties last year.
“Of course.”
10 minutes later, we were sitting on her hood, Gertie turned on her highest setting on the ground in front of us, and a large woolen blanket around our shoulders.
“I hate September.” Sydney leaned on my shoulder as we looked at the lake, “I hate Minnesota.”
“That’s why you’re moving to South Carolina after we graduate.”
She pinched my arm, “I’m going to The Citadel. Not just going to South Carolina.”
“I’m sorry I put it that way. You know how proud of you I am.” I fought back my laugh, “And how happy your dad was when he accidentally opened your acceptance letter.”
“Oh shut up.” She sighed, “Can you stop avoiding it and tell me what the hell is going on with you and Scarlett Santoro?”
“Nothing is going on.” I shrugged.
She practically growled as she sat up, “Tell me. Or I am getting in my car and driving you into the lake.”
I rolled my eyes, “Scarlett and I…” I looked away and fought my blush, “We’re hanging out.”
“Natalie Wilson.”
I looked down at my hands, “What do you want me to say?”
She put her hand on top of mine, “Take your time, dude. You know I know you. You know I don’t judge. Take your time.”
I nodded and looked up at her, “You know I’ve liked her.”
She nodded.
“You know she hit me in the face with a locker and drove me home.”
“Yep.”
“What else do you know?”
She shrugged, “You two have been hanging out. She’s totally in love with you though. I know that much.”
“Sydney! Scarlett Santoro is not in love with me!”
“She so is though! She stares at you in every class. She eats lunch with us now! And I know she has you wrapped around her finger. She could think of your name and you’d go running to her side. I know that she makes you happy. But that’s it.”
I sighed, “She doesn’t have me wrapped around her finger. It’s just hard to say no to her right now. And she eats with us because… Well I don’t know. We’re a thing.” I looked at her, “But she’s not in love with me.”
“Whatever you say.” She sat tucked her legs under herself and looked at me again, “Continue.”
I shrugged, “We kissed.”
Her eyebrows shot to her forehead, “Holy shit?” She sat up a bit, “You’re not joking! Holy shit!”
“Shh. Shhh.” I rolled my eyes at her, “We just- It happened. We were talking about, like, deep shit. And it was honestly the perfect moment. And I just told her. I just laid it out there. And I told her straight up. Then I went on this long rant about her. Then she told me she’d been waiting and she kissed me.” I slapped her arm, “SHE KISSED ME FIRST!”
“Ahh!” She grabbed my hands and we squealed together. “That is so amazing. Then what?”
I groaned, “Then her dad came in.”
“Well…” She looked at me and smiled widely, “Scarlett Santoro kissed you!”
“I know!” I sighed contently, “But I just- I want to be able to tell you. But Scarlett doesn’t want me to tell anyone. I get why and everything-“
“How long though?”
I raised my eyebrows, “What?”
“How long is she gonna wait to tell people? How long are you willing to wait?”
I shrugged, “I think whenever she’s ready, I’ll be ready. And she and I will decide when that is.”
“I like that. A good compromise. This seems like it could be a very healthy relationship.”
I nodded, “I think so. If it turns into something real.”
She rolled her eyes, “So tell me what it’s like.”
“What’s like?”
“I don’t know.” She shrugged, “Just being around her. Knowing you’re kissing the, like, hottest girl in school.”
I looked out the window, “Honestly Syd,” I looked at her, “it’s hard.”
“How so?”
“Scarlett is popular and I think that’s amazing. I think she’s the hottest girl in school and so does everyone else. I just don’t necessarily want to hide our relationship away from everyone for a long time. And…” I sighed and shook my head, resting it in my hands, “I just hate dating. I like the honeymoon stage. Nothing can go wrong and I’m so freaking happy it hurts. But then I obsess. And I self sabotage. And I go completely insane over it.” I looked at her, “Remember how bad it got with Gab?”
“I’d rather not ever think about you and her’s relationship.” She pat my back, “The things that happened during that period of your life, happened because Gabriella is a pill-popping, homewrecking, queerbaiting, snaggletooth, wannabe emo hoe. Okay? She pulled you down a bad path.”
“Got a lot of anger towards her huh?”
“Oh please! I have insults for days about this raggedy whore. She’s such a control freak bitch with a horrible home life so she takes it out on everyone around her. I don’t judge anyone. I sing kumbaya and whatnot. But that open-legged slut introduced you to pills. She’s the reason you were the way you were. That wasn’t your brain, Natalie Wilson. That was a manipulative liar who fed you illegal substances and called it love.”
“Syd-“
“No! I have a lot of anger built up around that point, okay? And I get so worked up when you talk bad about yourself!” She wrapped me in a hug, “I just love you too much. I don’t understand why you can’t love yourself too.”
“I do! I love myself right now.”
She pulled away, “No. None of that shit. You’re on a high horse because of Scarlett.”
“What are you talking about?”
She shook her head and held up her hand to me, “I agree with you on the honeymoon stage part of your relationship. You’re happy happy happy then you decline completely. I won’t let that happen.”
“That’s not what I meant-“
“Taylor Phire.”
“8th grade girlfriend. What about her?” I raised my eyebrows.
“She was experimenting.”
“So was I?”
“Ophelia Greco.”
“Summer fling.”
“She was experimenting too.”
“I don’t get your point.”
“William Dunn.”
“My first and only boyfriend.”
“Left you for who?”
I ruffled my eyebrows, “Yoli Andrews?”
“Who you ended up dating in the beginning of Freshman year.”
“I am lost now.”
“She was experimenting.”
“Okay, so the girls I dated in my adolescence wanted to figure themselves out and I helped? So what?”
“Gabriella.”
“Sydney-“
“Every girl that you’ve dated, they’ve been experimenting. Scarlett… You know she’s not?”
“I- Well she said she’s liked me for a while now.”
“Has she dated girls before you?”
“I- No. I don’t actually know. I don’t think so.”
“She’s dated boys.”
“Of course she has! She’s the cheer captain.” I fake gagged, “That was so high school cliche of me.”
She rolled her eyes, “Scarlett Santoro has never dated a girl. This will be the biggest relationship you’ve ever been in honestly. I just- I can’t see you get hurt. Not on this magnitude.”
“Scarlett’s not experimenting though, Syd. She actually likes me.”
She sat up straighter, “That is not what I’m saying! That’s not what I’ve been saying at all! I’m saying, I can not see Scarlett hurt you because she wants to try and figure herself out. Of course she likes you! It’s so clear that she does I think she might like you more than you think! I just can not sit back without saying it. Look for the signs.”
I hugged her, “I’m not an idiot Syd. But thank you. I agree.”
She hugged me tighter, “I could not find a way to get that out.”
I giggled and pulled away, “Let’s talk about Charlie Croft now, huh?”
Comment