— ★ —
â i’m so sick of myself âž
– 08:10
“hey rickyy“
wanyi skipped her way to ricky who was standing by the locker with two of his friends
she didn’t even bother to look at them because she only got her eyes on the one and only young and rich tall and handsome ð“¡ð“²ð“¬ð“´ð”‚
the annoyed blondie rolled his eyes before she could see and looked down at the shorter girl
“what do you want” his cold voice echoing through her ears
she couldn’t keep a steady eye contact as she sensed him looking straight into her eyes
her eyes averted towards the lockers, switching back to look at her feet or some parts of his uniform as she spoke
“hi, how are y-“
“get to the point” he spoke without sparing a glance at her
“well.. i made you something!”
wanyi handed the taller boy a small paper bag of snacks which was decorated with cute stickers
strawberry milk, two sandwiches and lots of sweets
ricky scoffed looking at her weirdly “you’re not serious”
“i AM serious”
she said with determined eyes and ricky’s two friends at the back giggled at the silly but cute friendly gesture the girl had done for her crush
ricky sighed and slammed his locker at her face loudly
“you’re embarrassing me”
the words dashed into her chest like daggers but tried her best to smile sweetly
“oh uhm, i just thought it’ll make you.. happy“
“well you failed miserably”
ricky looked around and sighed in relief seeing that not many people were passing by
without taking a second glance at the girl he walked past her
his same strong scent of perfume lingered around her nose as he walked away.. again
she turned back sadly and looked down at the gift
“hey! i know you, hao’s friend right?” said the brunette suddenly with a smile
she looked up at the boy and nodded in confusion
“i’ll take the gift and give it to him.. if that’s ok with you i’ll convince him”
he said with a reassuring smile
wanyi just sighed in defeat and handed him the paper bag and the boy bowed, which seemed more like a nod and trailed behind ricky
the second boy with black hair with chains on his neck then followed silently behind as he eyed the girl up and down
wanyi then forced a smile and walked to find her class where she saw hao sitting down next to her desk playing games
“hey you’re back”
“hey.. “
“how’d it go- wAIT DID HE ACCEPTED IT FOR REAL THIS TIME” zhanghao reacted excitedly
“no.. he didn’t ok, his friend said he’ll give it to him for me”
“oh- too bad”
“the person said he knows me though”
“maybe because you’re always up ricky’s ass all the time” zhanghao laughed and looked back at his phone
“no IM NOT! he asked me if im a friend of yours too”
“well do i give a fuck? no. how many fucks do i give? nONE”
“ugh you’re so annoying hao” she muttered and sat down next to him
“forget him wanii he doesn’t deserve you! he’s such a scumbag who doesn’t know anything about love”
zhanghao said to his best friend trying to lift up the mood and help her gain her confidence again
knowing fully that wanyi doesn’t know the full story of why ricky was like this
“yes.. you’re right”
“that’s the spirit”
“but ricky is so.. dreamy” wanyi started again as she smiled like an idiot and cupped her cheeks “i really like him bro”
“ah shit, here we go again!”
“IM SORRY BUT- it’s hard to let go like that completely!”
“true though but girl! you’ll get over him dont worry”
“what.. really?”
“you will!”
“but i don’t want to”
“wanwan!” zhanghao held onto wanyi’s shoulder and shook her
“you’re not in a fan fiction, your delusional fantasy is not coming true! im so sorry to say this babygirl but.. it’s true”
“damn bro i-” wanyi pouted and furrowed her brows as her eyes started to look bigger and got a little bit teary
“wanwan! nooo dont cry im so sorryyy, but feeding into your delusions all the time won’t help”
“it’s ok hao no IM sorry, im just stupid”
“im not telling you to GET OVER him this instant but yeah you’ll get the hang of it”
zhanghao smiled widely as he tried his best to make her smile and forget everything
just then the teacher walked inside to start the first class of the day
just when zhanghao thought his friend would try her best to avoid ricky
she didn’t listen.. ofc like every other friend with a crush would do
disobey their advisory friends when it’s literally they themselves who asked for advice
what’s the use of asking then??
– 12:15 lunch break
[ r1cky ]
wanwan
WHASSUP RICK!
[ seen 12:30 ]
wanwan
that brunette friend of urs said he’ll give the snacks to you!
wanwan
did u received it?
[ seen 12:34 ]
wanwan
dang bro
wanwan
did brunette dude give it to you??
r1cky
no
wanwan
OMG IT SPOKE
wanwan
did ricky just replied to me😨
wanwan
damn das crazy
wanwan
WAIT WHAT
wanwan
U DIDN’T RECEIVE THEM? HOW
r1cky
he ate it
r1cky
but who cares
wanwan
i care:(( i made those sanwiches just for you!
r1cky
oh do u hear that?
r1cky
the sound of me not giving a fuck
wanwan
ah-
wanwan
hahah ur so funny ricky
r1cky
give me some personal space?
wanwan
r1cky
fuck off stop spamming me fucking weirdo
wanwan
but- bUT NO WAIT LET’S CHAT FOR A WHILE
wanwan
let’s talk abt stuffs
[ seen 12:56 ]
wanwan
[ seen 12:58]
wanwan
ok
wanwan
whatever DONT TALK TO ME THEN!
[ seen 13:01 ]
wanwan
yyyeaaaah.. anyways!
wanwan
you look so handsome today ricky
wanwan
as always :3
[ seen 13:07 ]
–
“EEeejaKKKESHShsAaaaAA“
wanyi squealed uncontrollably while hao just looked at her weirdly
“since when did you escaped the psych ward”
“shutup“
wanyi then kept away her phone and picked up her chopsticks to continue eating
not noticing her face and ears were all red from the squealing
“you ok wan? want some water?”
“ricky responded! aaAAaGghGHH“
she squealed again silently leaving hao very confused
“wait you’re joking”
“nuh uh brother”
“let me seee”
he responded, kind of excited to see if ricky texted her something cute or nice
but his smiled dropped when wanyi showed him their text
“he wants you to fuck off?”
“he wANTS TO MARRY ME”
wanyi smiled widely leaving hao super weirded out “stop that wani you look like the grinch”
he scrunched his nose and she smiled even wider and hao screamed like a crow
he just shook his head leaving her alone in her delusional world and kept on eating
“whatever makes you happy bro”
–
ê’° ricky ê’±
man can she just fucking leave me alone
ricky walked with his long ass legs across the hallways with confidence on his shoulders
his natural way of walking appearing like he was on a runway leaving behind his strong scent of expensive perfume
his silver jewelries dangling from his ears which frequently sparkles under the light.
when they arrived at their classroom someone yelled from behind
“hey ricky!” said the brunette slowly running to him
ricky turned around and looked down at his hands to see the paper bag wanyi tried to give him
ricky was confused and furrowed his eyebrows
“why do you have that thing” he asked pointing at the object in pure confusion
“why? you were being such a jerk to her dude.”
“so?”
“bitch- she was being nice! here take it”
“gyuvin i dont fucking want it”
ricky scrunched up his face and backed off a few inches when gyuvin was tryna hand him the bag
gyuvin then sighed out loud
“you sure about that?” gyuvin raised a brow knowing there’s something in the bag that ricky really likes
“yeah i sure am”
ricky rolled his eyes and sat down on his seat
“fine! let’s eat the sandwiches jeonghyeon“
he said to the boy sitting in front of him as they grabbed the two sandwiches together
“wow! it has strawberries in it too” gyuvin said excitedly
“you sure you don’t want it?” jeonghyeon smirked as he slowly lifted the strawberry milk from the bag earning ricky’s attention
“looks like wanyi knows exactly what you like” gyuvin spoke teasingly as ricky looked at the two weirdly
after a short moment of silence, ricky quickly snatched the milk from jeonghyeon’s hands and pretended like nothing happened
“hey! you said you didn’t want any”
“well i guess i changed my mind”
“tsk! you bastard dont try to take the sweets from us”
“shutup you assholes”
ricky sipped on the strawberry milk during class, quite enjoying the sweet taste of the drink
he smiled to himself at how good the drink is already forgetting the person who gave him that
he really does not give a fuck about her
his interactions with girls who confess their feelings to him are tinged with a defensive edge and by pushing them away, he believes he can spare them from the pain he associates with love
he actually feels bad when he knows girls like him, more like he hates it
he hates when they confess their love to him.. disgusting
girls are nothing but snakes and liars
well- yeah i know im gorgeous af but they don’t know tons about me
why do they even bother to waste their time on me, im never gonna like them back anyway
you may say im a coward for not wanting to try again but i admit it i AM a coward for not wanting history to repeat itself
despite being highly sought after by girls due to his captivating appearance, charisma, popularity and unspoken rizz he despises the attention
ricky has constructed emotional barriers and consciously distances himself from girls and avoids any situation that could lead to romantic involvement
the memories of his past experiences continue to haunt him, shaping his perspective on love
he once dedicated himself to love, only to be hurt by it
leading him to gaslight himself questioning his own understanding of what love truly means
long story short he had some conflict with an ex girlfriend in the past who completely broke his trust and cannot see himself opening up to anyone again
except for his friends
the absence of his parents further exacerbates ricky’s struggle
their perpetual busyness and lack of emotional availability due to their business trips and flights here and there have left him yearning for their attention and affection
this unfulfilled need for parental love has gradually eroded his sense of self-worth and his ability to fully embrace his own emotions
despite the absence of his preoccupied parents and instead of succumbing to feelings of abandonment, he channels his energy into his passions
being a basketball player, channeling his emotions into the game while striving for excellence
— ★ —
poor kitty 🙁
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