‘’ = thoughts
: = dialogue
[] = System
* = Action
() = Author’s Note
(The Next Day)
After his dance test, Woo Jin was not on his mind the whole day. Ever since he heard the about his physical fitness from Lisa, he felt some kind of pain that he can’t explain.
Pain not because of his physical fitness but the truth about being an idol.
Ever since he was a kid, he loves performing in front of his parents and friends. He loves to sing, he loves to dance, he loves sharing his talents to everyone.
So he decided to become an idol someday. He wanted to be someone that can make everyone smile through his music.
So tried his best, he practiced all the time and disregarded his studies just so he can practice more.
He was the happiest whenever he do something related to music.
But after training for almost 10 years, he didn’t manage to debut. Something that he can’t understand.
Was it because of his talent?
Woo Jin was more than confident about his skills so why can’t he get a debut?
Was it because of his looks? Maybe because he looks normal?
The question he ask himself for those past remaining 5 years was never answered.
But who would have thought that he will receive the answer after going back into the past.
The answer he was longing for was finally in front of him yet he refused to accept it.
Was it because he was disappointed?
Remembering his previous body 15 years from the future, looking at that fragile body of a 30 years old man made him open his eyes.
Before he was Woo Jin now, he used to be this Woo Jin from before he got the system.
That fragile Woo Jin with a thin body and slightly above average face. Even how talented he is, he will never be able to achieve his dreams to become an idol.
Because after all, idols should posses an incredible talent, good looks and ideal body.
Facing the truth made him sad.
What is an idol?
Are those people who is talented, good looking and has a nice body are the only one who is considered an idol?
How can you define… an idol?
Woo Jin was asking himself this question all night before receiving a text message from Jennie that he will be having a personal meeting with the Chairman.
This moment should have made him shock but surprisingly, he didn’t felt any kinds of emotion.
He was just staring at the message while his mind was still on the question that he was trying to solve on his own.
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(The Next Day)
(YG Building-Chairman’s Office)
Arriving at the Chairman’s Office, Woo Jin’s mood was still at it’s worst state.
His eyes that used to shine so brightly turns dull and his aura that used to carry a welcoming and warm feeling felt so cold and distant.
This changes obviously didn’t manage to escape the Chairman’s observant eyes.
Chairman Kim: Is this a bad day for us to have a meeting? Did I perhaps cause a disturbance to you because of this sudden meeting?
Hearing the Chairman’s worry tone made Woo Jin come back to his senses and force himself to smile.
Woo Jin: It’s not like that Chairman, I just didn’t manage to get a proper sleep last night.
Woo Jin said but the Chairman knows that he was lying. Even without exerting some kind of external force, he knows base on Woo Jin’s eyes that something happened.
The day he met this kid was so different from now. His smile that used to be bright, now carries pain. And his eyes that used to be full of life has now full of confusion and longing for an answer lingers on it.
The Chairman doesn’t want to meddle on Woo Jin’s private life so he was about to tell him to go get some rest and just move their meeting some other time when the kid started talking in a very low tone.
Woo Jin: Chairman… what… is an idol?
Hearing his question made the Chairman confuse.
Woo Jin: What…make someone an idol? Was it the talent? Looks? Or perhaps… perfection?
Listening to Woo Jin made the Chairman finally understand what happened.
Confusion, doubts, and uncertainty that cause by the truth you can’t accept. Questions that results in ignorance.
Looking at Woo Jin reminds the Chairman of his previous self.
Chairman Kim: Woo Jin…the answer your looking for isn’t here *points as his head*…It’s here *points at his heart*…Now I want you to close your eyes, listen to your heart and ask yourself again…For you personally, what is an idol?
Listening to the words of the Chairman, Woo Jin started closing his eyes and ask himself…
‘For me…what is an idol?’
Is it when someone shine on stage? When someone born with a beautiful face? Or maybe… someone who you refuse to look at in the mirror…your truest self.
Looking at his previous self, Woo Jin finally saw something that he ignored all this time.
Why does he want to become an idol? Was it because of fame? Money? Or perhaps… mainly because music makes him happy…
He loves singing and dancing. He loves to perform in front of many people and be the cause of their smiles. He wanted to sing for the rest of his life simply because… it makes him happy.
Remembering his purpose made Woo Jin smile. He almost forgot the reason for everything.
Seeing the smile of Woo Jin made the Chairman sigh in relief.
Woo Jin: Chairman…everyone’s got their own idea of what an idol should be… for some people, Idols are the person who become someone else’s symbol and inspiration… someone to be their light in the dark… And someone who they can lean on… but for me…
Taking a deep breath and looking straight to the Chairman’s eyes, Woo Jin finally lift up his courage and accept his own self.
Woo Jin: For me… an idol is someone who shines and put a smile on other people’s faces while devoting themselves to something they love. I don’t care if people say I’m not fit to become an idol. For me… performing in front of many people is my way of shining. It doesn’t matter the size of the stage. What’s important is that…I want to do the things I love. That’s the kind of idol… I wanted to be.
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