The Only Child Chapter 15: Answers

Laura p.o.v

As Diana sat before me I could see her shifting uneasily under my unwavering gaze, growing more nervous with each passing moment. Her eyes darted everywhere except to meet mine, intensifying my frustration. It was clear she was aware of the underlying secrecy and unease, yet she chose not to discuss her suspicious behavior, choosing to keep me in the dark while I anxiously sought answers.

And then she had the audacity to ask, “What’s wrong?” 

I couldn’t contain my anger any longer. Crossing my arms, I retorted, “I believe you know precisely what’s wrong, and you’d better start explaining because I’m seething. So, the next words that leave your lips had better be something that can cool me down.”

Diana’s fingers fumbled nervously, and it took a few agonizing seconds before she managed to stammer out, “I-I think it’s time I confess. Please understand, this isn’t easy for me to admit…” Her demeanor shifted, her shoulders slumping, and a profound sadness etched across her face.

“I believe I am trans…” 

A heavy silence surrounded us.

“No, I’m certain I’m transgender.”

I raised my eyebrows in astonishment. Of all the things I anticipated she would reveal to me, this was the last one I expected. 

“Please say something,” She implored.

Now, it was my turn to falter. “I-I don’t know, I didn’t expect this. I thought you were going to say something else…” 

Diana furrowed her brows and sat up straight, a perplexed expression on her face. “What do you mean?”

My anger, momentarily subdued, flared up once more. I couldn’t believe she acted ignorant with me. I stood up and started to pace, my frustration boiling over. “You have genuinely no idea what I am hinting at?”  

My wife shook her head, her confusion evident. I couldn’t believe it had come to this, that I had to spell it out for her.

“I’m talking about the fact that you’re cheating on me!” I shouted in frustration, my voice quivering with emotion. “I saw you had a new match on Tinder the other day, and by the way, it’s pretty terrible that you didn’t even make an effort to hide the fact that you’re cheating on me. You do know you can turn off notifications, right?”

Unbeknownst to me, tears streamed down my face as I felt the teardrops fall on my failing arms. Diana moved to comfort me, but I held her at arm’s length. I could see the pain flashing in her eyes. Never had I rejected a hug from her. 

“I am not cheating on you,” She explained calmly. “I understand it looked bad, but I promise you I haven’t reached out to anyone on that app. You can check if you’d like.” She reached for her phone and extended it toward me.

I wiped my tears away. “Then why did you create an account?” 

“I created it a couple of weeks ago, on a lonely evening when I was feeling down. It was impulsive, and I haven’t revisited it since. I think I got a match from a few swipes I did before I realized it wasn’t what I wanted.”

I sighed. “Still, that doesn’t explain why,” I insisted.

Diana looked away, collecting her thoughts it seemed before returning her gaze to me. “I know you’re not bisexual. I know you prefer women, and when I came to terms with being trans instead of just an extreme butch bisexual, I was terrified of losing you. The night I created that account, it was a moment when I couldn’t suppress that fear any longer, and I acted impulsively… I’m sorry. I’m sorry for making you think I was cheating on you. I’m even more sorry for not deleting that app after that night.”

As I listened attentively to Diana’s heartfelt explanation, I could feel my anger ebbing away. I could understand where she was coming from and our relationship had built enough trust that I wouldn’t jump to conclusions about her actions. Besides, she had begun by sharing her truth about being trans, not about downloading a dating app. It all made sense, but I couldn’t deny it had scared the living shit out of me. 

It also brought me back to the core issue at hand—Diana, my wonderful wife, was trans.

I sat down to process this information. Questions swirled in my mind, questions that I needed to explore, both for myself and with Diana. 

“So, you are trans?” 

“Yes.”

“As in trans-man?” I asked to make sure. 

Diana chuckled lightly. “Yes, as in trans-man.” 

I tilted my head in contemplation. “Is that why you’ve been feeling down these past few weeks? Coming to terms with the desire to live as a man but not knowing the implications it might have?”

She nodded. “Yes, you could say that.” 

I grabbed for her hand which she accepted. “I am sorry.” 

Diana shook her head in confusion. “Sorry for what?” 

“That you had to go through that alone.” 

Tears welled up in her eyes, and she whispered, “Thank you.” 

We then embraced each other tightly, both shedding tears of relief and understanding. I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude that my wife wasn’t cheating on me and had no intentions of leaving our family. I was relieved she was staying with me and our beautiful daughters I couldn’t envision my life without her, whether she was trans or not.