The Last Time I Saw Your Stars Shine lighter

a/n

i was actually going to write a lot of chapter this week but actually i finished the story. I’ll upload them from day by day so yaur.

thanks for reading :>

–

san can’t belive he left wooyoung. leaving the boy all alone in the forest that night was the the most painful thing he has ever done not only to wooyoung but also to himself. he has never loved someone as much as he did with wooyoung – he has never loved someone in the first place.

when with wooyoung he was able to feel free. for the first time he could let his feelings go and he didn’t need to feel embarrassed or weird but now he feels trapped again. what made it worse, he knew he caused this and he blamed everything on himself.

letting his body guide him, san finds himself at a park which was only well known by the neighborhood it was surrounded by. being in his thoughts he doesn’t even know how he knows this place or how he got here. he hangs his head back after sitting down on a bench, taking deep breaths trying to figure out where he’s at.

“did you even love me?”

“of course I love you wooyoung.” he says in his head but its not what he said yesterday. san replays everything that happened last night in his head not like he wanted to but there is nothing else san can think about.

“i lost him.”

again and again in repeats in his head.

ignoring the footsteps he hears around him, he just doesn’t want to see people right now.

“san?”

who ever it was they were irrelevant now. hearing his name said out just annoyed him and knowing that it was probably someone who knew him annoyed him even more. the deep voice keeps calling him to the point where san frowns, opening his eyes to see a tall boy standing in front of him.

“what?” he yells at the other which was surprised by the sudden angry reaction.

“bro chill.” the boy seated himself beside him, taking out a pack of cigarettes. “want one?”

looking at them san hates it so much but at the same time his addiction his taking control of him.

“no, I’m good sorry for yelling at you.”

“ur forgiven.” he answers letting the smoke escape his mouth. “what are you doing here?”

“what are you doing here mingi?”

mingi started laughing at him. honestly he didn’t know why but seeing his old friend laugh made san laugh too which he definitely needed now.

“san did you forget I live in this area?”

it finally clicked in san’s head.

“now it makes sense how i ended up here.” both of them started to laugh once again which felt good to san. he never spent much time with mingi since san promised himself not to have friends but with mingi it was something else.

“so what are you doing here?” mingi asked again casually smoking his cigarette.

“just walking around.” san smiled faintly, he wasn’t sure if mingi knew he dated wooyoung since they dont talk a lot.

“walking around? isn’t that what you do when you have a lot on your mind?”

“are you a therapist or something?” the reason why mingi and san were friends is because mingi was always able to figure out what was wrong with san. especially since san never talked about his feelings.

“i broke up with my boyfriend.”

mingi nodded his head holding out the package of the cigs again. “sure you don’t want one?”

his brain was fighting with itself, he somehow wanted to but knowing that it was what upset wooyoung he knew he shouldn’t. but he gave in taking one out of the small package and lightning it with a lighter he always keeps by himself even tho he said he wouldn’t smoke again. but the feeling of the nicotine enter his lungs, he let his body loose relaxing on the bench they were sitting on.

“wanna talk about it?” mingi asked.

“I’m done talking about it.”

“you never talked about it tho.”

san looked at mingi with a frown. “how do you wanna know?”

“you barely have friends.” again mingi knew exactly how to get him.

“fuck i forgot how smart you are.” san laughed looking at his friend who smiled as well. “Its a very long story.”

“did you apologize?” mingi asked.

“there was nothing to apologize about. I met him for the last time and I told him everything and left.” san looked on the ground breathing in the cigarette every time he thinks about wooyoung.

mingi laughed. “what? that sounds youre the asshole in this case, sorry bro.”

“we can’t be together that why I left.” after san remained silent, smoking his thoughts away.

“i dont know what happened but if you’re on one side of the world and he is on the other that is what I call you can’t be together.” mingi explained demonstrating it with his hand and the cigarette.

“its not like that?” san tried to defend himself but he knew if he really tried he really could be with him but right now it seems too much away.

“you guys argued?”

“yea.”

“wow every couple fights.”

“mingi are you trying to help me or to make me feel like shit?”

mingi breathes out the smoke from his mouth before he starts talking again “honestly first I make you feel like shit and then you help yourself.”

they both didn’t say a thing then. mostly because they both wanted to smoke in peace. san also couldn’t say any more. he knew with everything he said mingi knew something better to say. taking one last smoke mingi threw it on the ground, stepping on it.

“if you really want it to work out you also have to do something. i’m leaving, was nice to smoke with you.” mingi stood up and smiled at san who seems to be in his thoughts again.

“probably will be the last time I’ll smoke with you.” san smiled back. but before mingi left he threw the pack of cigs at san. “take them as an heartbreak medicine and then stop smoking.”

being by himself now san also finished his cigarette. “I should probably leave too.” standing up his lighter he had in his hand the whole time fell on the ground and only now after looking at it san realizes how much of it reminded him of wooyoung.

–

“what are you doing, woo?” san asked him laying beside the younger who was laying on his stomach writing on something with san his arm around his waist. “is that my lighter?” wooyoung giggled when san realized.

“im writing something on it.” turning away from him so he won’t see.

“come on show me.” san whined trying to pull back his boyfriend but wooyoung fought against it.

“wait i’m almost done.” wooyoung said focusing on the lighter trying not to mess up. san was staring at his beautiful side profile combing wooyoung long hair back with his fingers to get a better look of his boyfriend. san couldn’t believe he was dating such a pretty boy only looking at wooyoung gave him butterflies.

“ur so pretty woo.” san whispered audible enough for the younger to hear. wooyoung blushed and his little smile that he was trying to hide was too cute to san.

“stop i’m trying to focus.”

after a little while wooyoung put the top of the pen of it signaling he was finally done with his masterpiece on san’s lighter.

“I’m finished.” wooyoung smiled turning back to san, laying close to his chest. san took the lighter in his hand that looked way bigger in his own.

please stop smoking

4 me hehe

ily sannie

woo <3

reading it in his head san’s smile grew bigger when he looked at his boyfriend to had his eyes on him the whole time. kissing the top of wooyoungs head, san pulled him closer so wooyoungs head was laying on his chest, hearing his heartbeat.

“its cute, i’ll carry it with me.”

wooyoung pouted “did you even read what’s on it? promise me you’ll stop.”

“i promise.”