Let’s gooooo!!
“Tony you’re asking for trouble.” Steve rolls his eyes and walks away.
“What’s he doing now?” Natasha asked.
“I want to play a drinking game, but he doesn’t want to play.”
“I can’t get drunk Tony, I’ve tried.” He frowns.
“I bet I can drink you under the table, stark.” Natasha smirks.
“Oh really? Your Russian blood makes you so tolerant to alcohol Huh?”
“You wanna find out?”
“We need more people.”
Tony went to his computer and gets on the loudspeaker so the whole building would hear him.
“Attention avengers, I will be hosting a drinking game. If you are 21 or older come to the living room and have some drinks.”
Thor was the first to walk in, voice booming with joy, “what is this game of drinking?”
“Oh man, thor is gonna kill us.”
“Don’t get scared now stark, you wanted to play.”
“Im not scared, Romanoff.”
Soon the rest of the team showed up, either to join or watch the buffoonery.
“Hey Mr stark, can I join?”
“Sure kid, you’re old enough.”
“Please stop calling me a kid.” Peter puts his hands on his hips and stands tall.
“Okay sorry, Peter.”
“So what’s going on with this drinking game? What’s the prize if you win?” Wade jumps into the chat.
“Ugh, I forgot you were here.” Tony rolls his eyes.
“Why wouldn’t I be? I always want to be around my baby boy.” He pinched Peter’s cheek and gets slapped away.
“Wade stop it.” He blushed and rubs his face to rid the ache that his boyfriend caused.
“Okay, so.” Tony speaks up to get everyone’s attention, “it’s simple, we play truth or dare, if you can’t answer the question or do the dare, you drink. The last one standing wins.”
“And what’s the prize?” Wade asked again.
“Um, the winner can make the losers do a single task of their choosing.”
“Ohh, I’m so winning.” Wade smirks.
Tony, Thor, Natasha, Peter, and Wade sit at the kitchen table, shot glasses and several bottles of vodka in the center.
Steve and the others watch on the sidelines.
“Okay, since it’s my game, I’ll go first in asking.” Tony says and looks around the table picking his victim.
“Wade, truth or dare?”
“Dare.”
“I dare you, to cut your hand off.”
“That’s it? I could blow my brains out, but then I would miss the game.” He shrugs and reached for the butcher’s knife.
“Sorry lefty, I’ll see ya again in a few hours.” The blade comes down on his wrist, hand flopping into the sink and blood pouring out, until he wraps it in a towel.
“Okie dokie, widow truth or dare?”
“Truth.”
“Lame. Um, are you in love with banner?” He smirks devilishly.
“I can’t answer that.”
“It’s yes or no.”
“Drink.” She says and pours a shot, taking it down like it was water.
“Ohh, damn.” Wade exaggerates his hand movement as if he was fanning flames.
“Peter, truth or dare.” Her voice was soft.
“Dare.”
“I dare you to slap Wade as hard as you can.” She smirks.
“Damn, first mutilated now getting slapped. Eh, I can take it. Hit me.” He turns to face peter and braced for it.
“I’m sorry.” Peter said softly. His arm stretched out and swings toward Wade’s face, palm connecting with his scarred cheek and he jerks to the side, falling to the ground.
Natasha laughed loudly, and others joined, seeing the loud mouth get slapped by Peter was the highlight of the year. He slowly stands up, holding his face.
“Shit fuck, that knocked a tooth out.” He spits the tooth and blood into the sink.
“I’m sorry, are you okay?”
“It will grow back, don’t worry.” He takes his seat and takes a shot just to get rid of the taste of blood.
“Okay, Thor truth or dare?”
“Give me your most mighty of dares, man of spiders.”
“Um, I dare you to..” he stops as Wade whispered in his ear. He looks at Wade like he had two heads, “seriously?”
“Yeah, it’d be funny.” He encouraged.
“I dare you to strip naked and fly outside.”
“I accept the dare.” He stands and takes off all his clothes, Natasha covers her eyes, mostly everyone did, Tony and Wade watched with amusement.
Thor walks out the sliding doors to the balcony and with mjolnir in hand, flys up and around the building.
“Wow look at him go, flopping in the breeze.” Wade laughs.
Peter made a groan of discomfort, almost sounding jealous.
Thor lands on the balcony and walks in, gathering his clothes.
Once he was clothed everyone opens their eyes.
“That was amusing, now, Stark truth or dare?”
“I’ll go with truth.”
Natasha whispers in Thor’s ear, Tony got a little nervous.
“Who did the breakup, you or pepper?”
Tony didn’t say anything he just pours a shot and drinks it.
“Oh I see, too embarrassed to tell us?”
“Shut up Romanoff.”
They played many rounds of truth or dare, each answering or performing to their best ability, and some taking shot after shot.
Tony was starting to feel it after his sixth shot, Natasha was nine shots in and only slightly drunk. Thor was 12 in and was fine, Peter only had four, his dares weren’t too harsh, they were babying him.
Wade had 15, and not any different from normal.
“Come on, I can handle more, give me something that I can’t do. I know I can’t get drunk.” Peter says with a pout.
It was Wade’s turn and he grins with excitement, “okay baby boy. Truth or dare?”
“Dare.”
“I dare you to give me a strip dance.”
Peter blushed and looks around the room, all eyes on him, waiting to see what he would do.
Peter stands up and walks to the fridge, he pulls out the mead that Thor usually drinks and swallows down two big gulps.
“Aw you’d rather drink that than give me a strip dance.” Wade pouts.
“Yes, because that’s not happening.”
“That is the finest Asgardian mead, you will regret drinking so much.” Thor warns.
The game continues, and Tony was the first to drop to the floor.
Steve picks him up and takes him to bed, mumbling and nagging the whole time.
Natasha admits defeat, she knew her limits and walks off while she could still move.
After a few more shots each, Thor and Peter seemed to be wobbling in their seats.
“Truth or dare, Thor.” Wade said.
“Dare.”
“Take a shot.”
He nods softly and takes a shot, it was game over for him.
“Well, it’s just you and me Peter.” Bruce and Clint had left when Natasha did, so they were alone.
“I don’t think I can drink anymore, I’ve never felt like this before, and I don’t like it.” He whines, slurring his words.
“Guess I win by default.” Wade smiles and writes a note for everyone to see in the morning.
“Tony has to make me breakfast, widow has to give banner a kiss, Thor has to let me pick up the hammer, and Peter will do whatever I say in the bedroom.” Was written and left on the counter.
Wade picks his drunk spider up and goes to their room.
“Wade.”
“Yeah?”
“You won, what’s the thing you want me to do?”
“We can talk about it in the morning. Get some sleep.”
“Noooo.” He whines.
“You’re so drunk, it’s cute.” He helps take his clothes off and lays him down.
“I’m naked.” Peter looks down at himself and giggles.
“You still have underwear on.”
“Takes those off too, and fuck me.”
“Nope, you’re not in the right headspace. Go to bed.”
“But, I want it.”
“No. Sleep now.” He cuddles him, arms wrapped around peter protectively and settled his face against his neck.
“Good night baby boy.” He kissed his neck.
“No, I, want…don’t, sleep.” He slowly fades out and falls asleep.
The next morning, Wade woke up to breakfast, while eating, he watched Natasha slowly walk up to Bruce, she grabs his face and kissed him; after she pulls away she quickly runs for the door.
“You think you’re worthy of mjolnir?”
“Maybe. Let’s find out.”
Thor hands him the hammer, slowly Wade takes it and once Thor let go, it dropped. But never touched the ground, Wade holds mjolnir high in the air.
“Wow, this is cool.”
“How can this be?”
“I’m worthy, call me Wade, god of um, death? No.” He scratched his head with the hammer.
“God of stupidity.” Said Tony.
“Suck a cock.”
“Wade god of immortality.” Said peter.
“I like it.”
Before he could swing the hammer around and hurt someone, Thor takes it back.
“Enough of that.”
“Someone’s salty.” He looks at Peter and smirks, “you ready for what you have to do?”
“Oh no.” He gulps with anxiety, he wasn’t ready.
“Let’s go have some fun.” Wade throws him over his shoulder and goes their room.
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