Behind The Limelight 18: That Handsomely Treacherous Face

“Ash?” Ryker whispered, one of his hands was still at the nape of Ashton’s neck, and the other was beside him on the kitchen counter. He was essentially trapping his fellow actor in.

“What?” Ashton spoke.

Ashton was in a trance like state. Unable to think and unable to move. Ryker was too close to him now, so close that he could feel the heat radiating off Ryker’s body. It was intoxicating, to say the least.

“You’re staring, you know that, right?” Ryker asked with a hint of a smirk.

In any other scenario, Ashton would’ve pushed Ryker away or snapped at him for acting sly. He would’ve rolled his eyes or replied with an insult. But for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to do this now. As if…as if he was afraid that if he responded in that way then Ryker would move. And Ashton did not want that.

“You’re staring at me too,” Ashton finally brought himself to say.

“About time you noticed that,” Ryker said.

“Huh?” Ashton frowned innocently, unable to figure out what Ryker meant.

“For fuck’s sake,” Ryker sighed, moving his hand to Ashton’s face instead as he caressed Ashton’s jawline with his thumb. “I didn’t know it was humanly possible to be this clueless.”

“Me?”

“Yes, you dumbass. I’m talking about you,” Ryker retorted. He couldn’t help but smile at the confused expression that was still on Ashton’s face.

“Fuck you, I’m not dumb,” Ashton furrowed his brows. “You’re dumb.”

“Seriously? That’s your comeback, now?” Ryker rose a challenging brow. “Come on, Ash, you can do better.”

“You’re making my hands itch, Ryker,” Ashton muttered.

“Oh yeah?” Ryker whispered. “What are they itching to do?”

“Punch you. What else?” Ashton answered matter-of-factly.

“Damn, I’m scared,” Ryker’s tone was filled with sarcasm, making Ashton roll his eyes.

“You’re too close. Your breath stinks,” Ashton lied as he looked to the side, no longer facing Ryker.

“Okay. I’ll move.”

Ryker loosened his grip and was about to take a step back when Ashton instinctively grabbed his arm, keeping the other man in the same position. Ryker grinned devilishly as Ashton flushed pink, shocked at his own reflex.

Ryker moved closer as Ashton’s hand travelling from the fellow actor’s arm to his bicep, his eyes widening at the proximity that seemed to have increased by a huge margin. Every inch counted when one was this close.

Ryker placed his other hand on Ashton’s waist. Ashton stopping him from moving away emboldened the dark haired man even further.

“You push me away then pull me closer,” Ryker said, his voice lower and deeper than usual as he stared into Ashton’s eyes. “What do you want from me, Ash?”

“I… I already told you what I want,” Ashton answered softly.

“You say one thing but then act in a completely different way,” Ryker said. “So I’m asking you one last time.”

“Ryker…”

“What do you want, Ash? What do you want me to do?” Ryker spoke softly.

Ashton’s breath was uneven, his heart rate off the charts as he stared at the man in front of him. He had never been this up close to Ryker, and he was only now noticing all the little things about the other man’s face that he had never done before.

Like how the light stubble defined the sharp structure of his jaw even more. How his eyes weren’t black but had a shade of brown in them, especially in the light. How his nose was crooked in the slightest, he couldn’t help but wonder if his punch had anything to do with it. And on top of everything, how soft his lips looked…

The words were at the tip of his tongue.

Fuck you. Go away. I never want to see you. I hate you.

This is what Ashton would’ve said. This is what he thought he wanted to say. Then why was his mouth feeling dry and his throat choking up as he parted his lips to let the words out? Why was there a battle going on inside his mind? He didn’t even know which side of the war he was on. Or what he was fighting for.

Ryker was awakening something in him. Something he had never even wondered about. As Ashton’s gaze fell down to Ryker’s lips…he couldn’t help but wonder what it would feel like to kiss him.

The thought sent a wave of panic down Ashton’s spine. A chill that was as electrifying as a shock. He gulped, wondering what the hell was wrong with him.

“What do… what do you want?” Ashton managed to ask.

His own intrusive thoughts and feelings aside, he couldn’t quite figure out what Ryker’s motive was behind the way that he was acting. Why was Ryker so hellbent on helping him out and constantly chasing after him? Why was he holding him so close? Why was he looking at Ashton as if… as if he wanted the same things that Ashton did.

“If I tell you I’m afraid you’ll hate me even more,” Ryker answered.

“I don’t think that’s possible,” Ashton replied with a light scoff, causing Ryker to frown as his grip on Ashton’s waist loosened.

“Why, Ash? Why do you hate me?” Ryker questioned, his voice reeking of vulnerability. “What did I do to make you despise me so much?”

“You really don’t know?” Ashton pressed his lips in a thin line as Ryker shook his head. “Rhythm of Summer.”

“Huh?” Ryker furrowed his brows in confusion. “The movie?”

“My grandfather’s first movie. The first movie that any of my family ever acted in,” Ashton spoke. “The remake, Ryker. You knew how much I wanted it. You knew I had been preparing for it since forever and you knew how much it meant to me to get the role…”

“And you did,” Ryker said.

“Because you got injured and couldn’t act!” Ashton snapped, keeping his hands on Ryker’s chest to push him back. “You didn’t even tell me you had auditioned for it! I was waiting and waiting for a call back and what did I find out? That my so-called best friend stole the one role… the one role that meant the world to me.”

“Ashton, that’s not—” Ryker paused, blinking in surprise. “—that’s not what…”

“That’s exactly what fucking happened, Ryker,” Ashton’s expression contorted into anger. “I found out from my agent that not only did I not get the role, but that you did. My best friend who ran lines with me and helped me rehearse, who drove me to the stupid audition, who…”

“Ash, please—”

“Who I trusted with my fucking life. That best friend went behind my back to steal the one thing that I…” Ashton paused, his voice dropping as his eyes started watering. “That I needed. I didn’t just want it, Ryker. I needed that role to prove to my family that I’ve got it in me. That I’m worthy of the Archer name and not just… not a disgrace to it.”

“You’re not…”

“Yeah, well,” Ashton closed his eyes, inhaling deeply. “Tell them that. My mom laughed at my face and my dad wasn’t even surprised. And the disappointment on my grandpa’s face…”

“Ash, just listen to me—”

“And had it been anyone else, any other fucking actor in the entire world then I would’ve gotten over it,” Ashton rambled on. “But it was you! It was fucking you. So how can I not hate you, Ryker? How can I not hate you for betraying me?”

“That’s not what happened, Ash,” Ryker said desperately. “I didn’t even audition for it. The director reached out to me himself and—”

“I don’t want to listen to any more of your lies and excuses. You didn’t audition and the director reached out? So what? You could’ve told me yourself. But you didn’t… I thought you were my best friend and…”

“I was!” Ryker walked towards Ashton, grabbing his arm to make the other man look at him. “Look, I’m sorry, okay? I fucked up. I’ve fucked up time and again but—”

“Keep your apologies to yourself, they don’t mean shit to me,” Ashton snapped, stepping closer to the dark haired man.

“Ash…”

Ashton said nothing as he stared at Ryker, still looking and feeling angry. The frown on Ryker’s face was pissing him off even more. He didn’t want to see any fake sadness or guilt. They were close yet again, but this time the air between them was different. Ashton felt like Ryker was burning him from his fingertips, his arm felt like it was on fire where Ryker was holding him.

Ashton wanted to shrug it off. To walk away. To go back home. To tell Eric Tate to suck it and not show up at the set. To never see Ryker’s face again.

His stupid, treacherous, deceitful but handsome face that Ashton had an undeniable urge to get even closer to.

Silence took over them as both their minds raced with a million thoughts. Ashton’s palms were still closed up in fists as he glared at the other man, yet he made no attempts to move away or leave.

“Ash—”

“Fuck you.”

Ashton cut Ryker off mid-sentence as he took a final step closer to him, keeping a hand at the back of Ryker’s neck to pull the fellow actor down towards him. Ryker’s eyes instinctively closed and he wrapped his arms around Ashton’s waist as he lowered his lips onto the other man’s.

They kissed like two people that were dying of thirst and this was the only way to stay alive. It was rough and desperate, with Ryker’s nails digging into Ashton’s back, and Ashton tugging at Ryker’s hair. Ryker slowly pushed Ashton back, trapping him against the wall as he kissed him even deeper.

They pulled apart, Ashton’s face was red and for a moment he forgot how to breathe as he gasped for air. Ryker was staring at him with slightly wide eyes, as if he was now worried about what Ashton would do.

His question was soon answered as Ashton pulled him closer for a second round.

***

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