Jays POV:
I can’t believe what just happen today. Driving back to my house I couldn’t get his face out my head, couldn’t stop thinking about him. His voice, his eyes, his bruises, his scars. I felt anger slowly build up inside m at the thought of how hurt he is, he’s so skinny and beat. I Swear when I find out who did it I’m going to FUCKING murder them. How could anyone do that to him? He’s so fragile and adorable, that’s like killing a puppy or kitten, how could you do that?
I though about him through out the entire night, and the morning, and all the way to school .
“HELLOOOOO!!!” I snap out of my trance to see a dark hand waving in front of my face.
“yh what, sorry.”I chuckled
“Jeez what is up with you? I asked where were you yesterday, I didnt see you at lunch.”Amy said as we made our way to our lockers, which are conviniantly right next to each other.
“Oh, well funny story there. I actually took Asher home after he passed out and refused to go to the nures.”I reply with a grin the size of my face, it not my fualt I cant help smiling.
“WHAT!!! AND YOU DIDN’T TELL ME!!!”she shreiked, cathching the attention of many passing stuadents.
“Yeah Ill explain it all in free period before lunch, meet me in the library, promise. But I have to go to biolagy now.”
“I want all the details or ill cut off your dick and shove it down your thraot!!” wow, that was harsh. I shivered at the thought that she would prbably actually do that. I just turn and walk away with a look of horror plastered on my face.
I walk into biolagy and scan the room for the one boy who likes to make himslef invisable, he was pretty good at it too. I spot him in the far right of the room, and theres a free seat next to his, so thats obviously were I go to sit down. Class started moments later and it was boring as hell even for me, Ive already covered the toipc before. So I do the only thing I can think of.
“You joining my table at lunch?”I write on the coner of my page and rip it of before sliding it onto hos desk. He reads it then looks back at me in shock. It takes him a while to think about it but eventualy he writes down his answer ans pases it back to me.
“If you want me to, then yes.” I read from the scrap of paper, it instantly slapped a smile on my face.
“….So then he agreed to be friends with me and I took him home.”I explained as Amy had her eyes trained on me the entire time. I told her everything that happened yesterday, when I took him home, how he was littered with bruises, how skinny he was. I conveniently left out the part about why Asher struggles with his speech and his past, I don’t really think it’s my place to say that.
“YOUR AN IDIOT!!”She screams in my face like a lunatic, earning many shushes and evil glares from the students in the library.
“Huh? Why am I and idiot?”
“Oh your blind too. Jeez” she huffed and pinched the bridge of her noes.
“You literally friend zoned him, why would you do that? He was at your house! You helped him and he trusted you, you just threw that away by asking him to be your ‘friend’. Thats stupid.”
“NO, I asked him to be my friend because I want to take it slow, you know get to know him a bit and shit like that so he’s like comfortable around me, before like bombarding him, he seems fragile.”
“My god, you really are in love with him. And about the bruises, do you think it was Justin?”Even just hearing his name made me want to smash his pathetic face in.
“I’m not sure, but I’m going to ask him.”
“Yeah sure, you just gunna go up to him and be like ‘hey I just wanted to ask you, when was the last time you beat the shit out of Asher? Like just for personal reasons pease tell me’.”She replied sarcastically.
“I have my ways.”I said just before the lunch bell went off.
“I’ll see you at lunch, I have something to do first.”
I saw Justin talking with Duncan and Victoria two halls from the cafeteria. If he really is the person who hurt Asher that badly, he’s going to regret it. As I storm over to him I can feel the anger building up in my veins. He noticed me coming, but he wasn’t prepared for me to instantly grab his shirt and pin him to the lockers behind him.
“Did you touch Asher?!”I hissed through gritted teeth.
“N-No, I swear I haven’t touched him since. I-I swear.”he stuttered out , literally shaking with fear, his eyes literally bursting out his sockets. I stare into his eyes, but I cant see a flicker of anything but fear. He wasn’t lying. I drop him from the lockers and look down the hall to see a new crowd of students, but a curtain pair of slightly mismatched eyes caught my attention with fear laced into them, shit.
Asher turned on his heels and started to sprint the other direction and around the corner. With out another thought I chase after him down the endless halls.
“ASHER!!! WAIT!”I shout, but he didn’t even spare me a glance as he bolts for the stairs, me following after him.
He climbed all the way to the top of the stairs, all the way to the rooftop. He’s really fast for his size, and agile with the corners as he leapt every other step until he came to the top. Bursting through the metal door and shutting it behind him, in my face. My hand hovers over the handle, should I just leave him? Am I going to make it worse? UUGGG fuck it.
The roof was completely empty at first sight, just a plain rocky floor and a small wall. The only thing stopping form believing he disappeared was the heavy breathing I can hear over the wind. Following the sound around the door, Asher is curled up against the wall hugging his knees and burying his head, slowly rocking and taking deep breaths.
I slowly walk closer to him, but he hears my footsteps and his head shoots up and he tenses even more.
“I’m not going to hurt you, I already told you that. I will never hurt you so long as I breath!.”I sympathise, slowly stepping closer.
“N-no y-you h-hurt h-h-im. Y-your going t-to h-hurt m-m-me.”He starts panicking and shaking his head, like he’s having an argument with himself.
He hid his face in his knees, his breathing is deep and short, struggling for air as he slowly sobs and rocks back and forth on the floor. I felt a physical pain in me just at the sight of him. The though crosses my mind that I might make it worse because it the whole reason he’s like this, but I can’t just leave him here to help himself.
“Hey, Asher. Is it ok if I step a little closer?”I calmly ask, but he doesn’t reply. Of course he wouldn’t rely you dumass he’s having a fucking panic attack!. Right, yeah that makes sense.
With out waiting for him to answer me considering I don’t think he can. I start to slowly take small steps towards his small balled up body.
Ashers POV ( sorry for keep on changing the POV Ik its kinda annoying to read)
He’s violent!, HE’S just like them! Like dad and Justin. And he’s going to hurt me!!. The thoughts bombarded my head until it pounded so hard against my skull. I have no idea about my surroundings, everything’s just so dizzy and unclear. I feel like I’m suffocating, can’t get a single gulped air in as my lungs yearn for it, as the burn and beg. I just feel in pain. Everywhere, not like the pain from my father or Justin, no. This pain I can’t actually feel, I just know its there, taunting me.
Everything is closing in on me, getting smaller and smaller, crushing me. I feel petrified to my core, I have no idea what I’m sacred of though. It’s all just happening so fast, I can’t keep up with it. I felt death knocking on my door, like I’m dying on the spot. It feels like its never going to end.
“All ways remember that the pain comes to an end eventually. Regression to the mean.”her soft voice echoed on my bedroom walls.
“what does that even mean, Mum? why are you always so cryptic?”I questioned. She sat with the arms tightly wrapped around me on my bed, keeping me safe. It was the middle of the night, I had a nightmare and mum had come to calm me down, she always calmed me down.
“The only reason I’m cryptic is because in makes me sound wise, and slightly smarter than I am.”She chuckled, making me laugh slightly through my salty tears.
“Regression to the mean, means. That everything must come back to the middle. Even in life, no matter how bad it gets it can’t stay bad, it has to come back to the middle, to when your life is ok and eventually better.”
“doesn’t that also mean that happiness will come to an end too? And that its going to come back to the ‘middle’?”I questioned, she raised an eye brow and a smiled danced across her lips.
“Your a smart little one aren’t you?”
“I have my mothers genes to thank for that, or maybe it was dads?”I tease, somewhat regretting it after, knowing exactly what was coming my way.
“Why you cheeky little…”she started to snake her hands to my sides and tickling the life out of me. I laugh and squirm under her torture, pleading for mercy. Eventually she stops and I carry on giggling for another minute or so.
“And to answer your question young man. To fix the conundrum, when you find happiness in your life and in the people you love, you just have to hold onto it and never let it or them go. Ever.”she sent a warm smile at me before starting got get off the bed, but I’m quick to grab her arm.
“Can you….like stay? Until I’m asleep. You know, to make sure I don’t have another nightmare. Please?”I plead
“Absolutely, I was waiting for you so say that eventually.”She replied and came back onto the bed. Pulling the covers over us and wrapping her arm protectively around me, making me feel like she was my shield, keeping me safe.
I breathing starts to calm down, still a bit jagged though. For some reason I can still feel my mothers safe shield around me, her arms wrapping around me. I look up from my knees not to come face to face with my mother, but Jays.
“It’s ok, it’s ok now Ive got you.”He whispers softly with his angelic voice into my ear, his head resting on top of mine as he held me from behind, keeping me firmly in his grasp as he runs his hands soothingly through my hair.
I should be scared of him, I should be terrified. But I’m not. In his arms I feel safe and warm, I feel like I’m never going to feel pain ever again, and I want to hold onto it. So I don’t move or push him away. I let him calm me down and whisper soft comforting words in my ear as my heart slows down and that feeling of suffocation and pain disperses. Even after It’s all been chased away, no longer haunting me, I still don’t move. The feeling of him holding me, feeling of safety, is something I’ve longed for for so long Ive lost track. I just let myself slowly melt into his embrace and let my muscles finally relax.
The cursed bell for lunch break rings from below us, breaking my peace and scaring me out of my skin. I yelp rather loudly and jump 5ft in the air as my heart skips a beat and goes straight to a thousand times faster.
“Wow, hey it’s ok, just the bell. Nothing to be scared of, promise.”He soothes as I slowly calm down. I want to lay my head back on his chest and listen to his steady heart beat, but I know I have to go back to class and leave this feeling behind me. Life sucks.
“W-we have c-class.”I sadly force out.
“We don’t have to go, if you want me to I can stay here with you.”
“n-n-no, I-I have t-to go.”
“Ok.”is all he says, but he smiles anyway. He gets up from the floor and pulls me up with him effortlessly, then leads us to the door. I notice him holding my hand and instantly go beet red again, cures me and my pale skin!. before he walks through the door I pull him to a stop and reluctantly pull my hand out of his. He turned to face me with confusion and a hint of sadness.
“Th-thank y-y-you, A-and s-sorry for m-mak-king y-you miss l-lunch.”I said,scalding myself for the stutters, even though I can’t help it Is really embarrassing and this moment in time.
“Your welcome, and It’s cool about lunch I wasn’t hungry anyway, I wouldn’t have been able to eat if I left you here anyway.”He shrugged his shoulders. Then did something I did NOT expect. Before I could process what happened I felt his soft, smooth lips briefly press against my left cheek and heat radiating from that spot. Then He turned and bolted down the stairs.
What just happened? WAIT A SECOND. DID HE JUST KISS ME!!!! OH MY GOD JAY KISSED ME!!!Â
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