apologies to everyone who’s been following the progress of reject. i meant to upload yesterday but something happened to my msword and three of the recent chapters were deleted and was unrecoverable. i will try to upload again later but no promises okay. i will just try my best. k”,)
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Shit! What in the world happened? How could a simple talk turn into an all out brawl?
Bran and Sorell are still hunched and unconscious on the chairs I placed them on. They’d both be bruised and would be suffering severe headache when they wake up but the alternative could have been much so much worse. If I didn’t step in when I did and separated them they could have badly injured one another.
Harkin seemed unharmed and unconcerned that Kevan turned on him to protect Lorcan and Prior appeared uninjured as well. They still haven’t shifted back and seemed content to remain in their wolf form for the time being.
I looked over at Lorcan and Kevan. They, too, seemed fine. Actually, Lorcan looked like he’d never been better his whole life. Sure. Yeah. Whatever. His reactions to the situation don’t take much precedence at the moment anyway since he’s on a very complicated phase right now. But that’s neither here nor there, so let’s leave it be for now.
I turned to Ciaran and quickly scanned his body for injuries and sighed when I found none.
“Are you alright?” I asked just to be sure.
“I should be the one asking you that,” he smiled.
Ciaran reached out to run his fingers on my cheek. The intimate gesture earned a feral growl from Kevan but Ciaran didn’t spare him a glance. He continued to caress my cheek and it worked wonders in soothing my frayed nerves.
I closed my eyes and leaned in to the touch.
“Thank you,” I whispered.
“For what?” He asked.
“Just because…”
He chuckled and leaned in for a kiss. The bold move sent Kevan on the edge and he lunged to charge at Ciaran.
I quickly maneuvered Ciaran out of the way just in time to grab Kevan and take the blunt of the attack.
We crashed on the floor with a resounding thud.
Kevan tried to fight me off. But for some reason, even on his wolf form, he was no match for me and I managed to pin him down without much effort.
“Kevan, don’t fight me.” I started in a gentle tone as he continued to struggle. I took care not to apply too much pressure on my hold and exerted just enough force to keep him down. I didn’t want him to submit to me. I just wanted him to stop. “I don’t want to hurt you. Please brother…”
Kevan immediately stopped thrashing and I slowly let him go, convinced that he wouldn’t launch another unprovoked attack on my mate. Our heads snapped up when Ciaran suddenly growled. He was crouched on a fighting stance in front of us facing Lorcan, who was poised to lunge at me to rescue Kevan.
Gad what a fucking mess!
“Come,” I turned to my brother and motioned towards the door. “Let’s go for a run.”
Ciaran and Lorcan moved to accompany us, so did Harkin and Prior. But I moved to block their attempts and raised a hand to stop them.
“Just me and my brother,” I said. “Please.”
Kevan turned to Ciaran and inclined his head. If he were in human form I’d say he has a smug look on his face right now. But since he’s on his wolf form his expression just showed a sinister sneer showcasing canines and a lot of sharp teeth. I sighed and shook my head as he huffed and sauntered out of the room.
Ciaran wanted to argue, I could tell, but he didn’t say anything as he looked back at me. From the expression on his handsome face he looked like he’s having trouble keeping Keiron at bay.
“It’s just a run,” I said standing in front of him. I placed a palm on the center of his chest, feeling the frantic beating of his heart and willing it to calm down. “We’ll be back in two hours. And we won’t go far. You can link with me anytime you want.”
He took my hand and placed it on his cheek, closed his eyes before turning his head and planting a kiss on my palm.
“Ciaran,” I shivered resting my head on his shoulder. “You know I have to do this. You understand right?”
He breathed in and out harshly before he sighing in defeat.
“Fine.” He said. “But if you’re not back within two hours I’m coming after you.”
I chuckled and lightly touched my lips to his. “Yes, alpha.” I teased.
“I’m serious Ruari.” He growled grabbing my face closer to his. “This is a compromise. I’m agreeing to leave you alone with your brother for two hours if you promise not to go far and tell me where you are at all times.”
“I promise.” I answered solemnly.
Ciaran gave me a lingering kiss before letting me go.
“Oh, babe…” I stopped by the doorway and turned back to Ciaran who raised an arrogant brow at me in question. “Try not to kill each other while I’m gone. They’re still our guests you know and it would be hard to explain to everyone why we’re short one beta.” Then I turned to address Lorcan. “You can wipe that stupid look off your face. Regardless of what I said earlier I won’t hurt my brother. He’d be safe with me.”
Both of them grunted in response and I just laughed on my way out of the pack house. I was in time to intercept Kevan who was on his way back to get me. He growled irritably at me for taking too long to join him outside.
“Excited are we?” I teased as we headed towards the tree line.
The pack warriors who usually accompany me on my run shadowed our movements.
“I’m going alone with my brother.” I said. “I already informed Ciaran.”
They nodded their assent but kept their eyes trained at us until we entered the forest. I walked behind a tree to remove my clothes before phasing and joining my brother on the clearing.
Our wolf forms, like our human ones, are almost identical. Kevan also has reddish brown fur with black streaks running along his back and tail but he didn’t have the white fur that covers my chest and underside.
He eyed me closely. He circled around me once memorizing my scent, and I his, before playfully nipping at my ears and tail. He was jumped up and down, wagging his tail like an overly eager pup.
I nipped back at him and motioned with my head for him to precede me for our run.
We started at a sedate pace, a slow jog, before gaining speed. The forest air felt good and I was surprised that Kevan could easily keep up with me every time I increased our pace a notch just to keep it interesting. I wasn’t running at full speed but no one at Moonscape was able to run at the pace I set except for the pack tracker but even he struggles most of the time.
“Oh come on!” Kevan whined through our mind link. “You can go faster than this! Stop being so lazy. Let’s run!”
“Are you sure you can keep up?”
“Try me,” he dared.
I didn’t deign to answer and just shot forward increasing my speed as I zigzag to avoid trees. I howled when I felt him running closely behind me. He was not far behind but he couldn’t quite catch up. And every time he manages to shorten the gap between us I go faster just to annoy him. He wouldn’t admit it but he’s now struggling.
I continued to run at a punishing pace so he’d burn out all the tension coiled inside him before turning back and heading towards the lake. Once we were there Kevan graciously collapsed by grassy bank and growled at me when I tried to push him up with my nose.
We sat quietly for some time. We just looked out towards the sparkling water, saying and doing nothing, content with each other’s company.
“Why are you angry with Ciaran?” I started.
We wouldn’t finish this talk if we don’t start and I took him out here specifically for this. We can’t talk in the pack house because he’s too tensed there. Ciaran and the pack’s presence annoyed him because he doesn’t trust them and vice versa. Here we could be alone and undisturbed. We could talk freely.
I understand Ciaran’s and the pack’s feelings towards Kevan. He wants to take me away, he so himself. For Ciaran protecting me and keeping me by his side is his main priority right now. And the pack follows its alpha’s lead. Although I’m not inducted back in the pack they already view me as one of their own and as pack leader after Ciaran marked me.
But with Kevan, I don’t understand how or why he got it in his head to take me away. Not that he could actually do it, but still. I want to know the reason why he thinks he needed to save me from my mate. We’re brothers, I get it, he feels some sort of obligation to protect me. But we hardly know each other. To be brutally honest, we’re virtually strangers. So why?
“They told me you’re dead you know.” He answered resting his head over his front paws. “That you died in an accident while under Cassandra’s care.”
I flinched at that. It was one thing to be ignored, to be denied and told you’re unwanted. But to be pronounced dead when you’re clearly living is just… cruel. Why would people lie to him like that?
“I didn’t believe any of the bullshit they tried to fill my head with. I knew you were alive, I could feel it. And it doesn’t matter what anyone said.” Kevan continued. His tone was filled with anger and resolve. “I wouldn’t, couldn’t believe you were dead unless I was presented with a concrete proof.”
I looked at Kevan and my gut twisted painfully. He’s been looking for me all this time and I didn’t even know. He knew about me but I didn’t realize he existed until he showed up here.
“Growing up in the palace is not as glamorous as it sounds especially for someone who wasn’t supposed to be there like me. People could be cruel and worse, those who you believed would help and save you would betray you without an ounce of hesitation if it suited their purpose…”
So I was right. He did have a tough time. And the consequence of his suffering shows on how he deals with people, on how he protects himself from others by purposely finding faults and mistrusting them.
“They all thought I was unhinged because I would tell and beg anyone who cared to listen that I needed to find you. I don’t how but I could feel you and it was painful. I would cry for hours for no reason and I knew it was you hurting. I know I needed to save you.”
I scooted closer to where he was to show him I was there, he already found me. At first he tensed but eventually he relaxed and enjoyed our close proximity.
“Because of my stubbornness I was isolated from everyone and for a time it frustrated me. I felt like I was only deluding myself. I kept thinking that maybe they’re right. I was crazy. That maybe I was just using the memory of you to cure myself of loneliness, to remind myself that I wasn’t alone. Does that make sense?”
I remember the moments when I wished for someone to give a damn, to care for me. When the loneliness was so thick I could barely feel or see myself through it. I remember taking solace on the thought of pretend companions, shadows of people that would love and accept me for everything that I am and was not, hopelessly trying to convince myself that I wasn’t alone and lonely.
“Yes.” I answered silently. “Yes, it does.”
I could easily imagine how he felt all these years. Being surrounded by people who didn’t believe his pleas for help. Who treated him badly and made him feel like he was inadequate and not himself.
“How did you find me?” I asked.
“About half a year ago a woman came up to me on a gathering. She asked me about my vacation, if I enjoyed Paris and if I was thinking of coming back soon. I instantly knew she was talking about you. Because even if I’ve been known to travel a lot I’ve never been to Paris before.”
It’s possible. Jean always drags me to France to visit her mother’s side of the family and we often stay in Paris for fashion week because Jean is addicted to shopping. If anyone who knows Kevan, and doesn’t know about me, saw me they would easily assume I was him.
“I wasted no time flying over to Paris. But it seemed like before I even got there all traces of you was already gone, or should I say wiped clean.” He said. “It took me three months just to find someone who was willing to tell me your name. After that it was just a matter of tracking you down.”
It took him six months to successfully locate me. That’s amazing considering Jasper Gale was blocking everyone’s attempt to find me. And believe me when I say that going around Jean’s father is virtually impossible.
“You still haven’t answered my question Kevan,” I said because it’s the most important. “Why are you mad at Ciaran?”
“Do you even have to ask?” He scoffed and I just inclined my head.
He huffed and turned his head away. If I didn’t know any better I’d say he was acting, well, shy.
“They hurt you…” He mumbled quietly. “He and his pack they hurt and degraded you. I had my specialists dig as much as they could about you and they found a lot. How your so-called pack treated you like dirt. How your mate turned out to be a useless bastard. And how you almost died in London…”
I was shocked. How much does he know? But my heart instantly warmed at the thought, at his reasons for thinking and feeling the way he did.Â
“I admit my life haven’t been easy. Maybe sometime we could compare notes to see who suffered more while growing up. But it’s in the past Kevan and I made mistakes too.”
I don’t want him to continue to think I was blameless in all my dealings with the pack and Ciaran. I wasn’t an innocent bystander and Ciaran had his share of pain too. We all made mistakes. It’s just a matter and forgiving and moving forward, thinking about the future is what matters.
“It’s different now…” Kevan still looked convinced so I added, “He banished them you know. Everyone who hurt me was sent away from the pack.”
“That’s the least he could do after how they treated.” He snorted. “They should all be whipped and beheaded for what they did.”
“Oh and I could also demand for their first born as compensation. What do you think?” I laughed. I couldn’t help it. Kevan’s talking like whipping and beheading are common punishments for acts of misdemeanor. And maybe for royals it is but for a regular pack, like Moonscape, we go for the old fashioned banishment, swift but less bloody.
Kevan growled irritably at me and I nudged him with my nose to show him I was kidding.
This isn’t going anywhere. He won’t be convinced just by words alone. He needs to see it for himself so he’d believe.
“Why don’t you stay here for a while, get to know the pack and Ciaran. I’d like to spend some time with you too. Let’s catch up.” I suggested. “Besides, I might need your help about something as well.”
“The raiders?” He said eyeing me closely. “Gideon Loch?”
My eyes narrowed at that.
What does he know about the raiders and Gideon? Does he know who’s backing them up? Does he know who the mysterious collector is?
I stood and stared at my brother, the fur on the back of my neck stood in anticipation. Kevan stood up and met my gaze. From the steady look in his eyes I knew. He knows everything.
“Tell me,” I demanded.
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