Stiles lay on his back giving a large part of his attention to the popcorn ceiling in Scott and Isaac’s condo. Isaac was sweeping away in the kitchen trying and failing not to give his input as Scott sat by listening as best he could. In all fairness Stiles could see why his friend was having trouble following along, it shouldn’t have been as big of a deal as he made it but here he was freaking out “What did you say?”
“I asked him if I could think about it” Stiles didn’t bother to mention the fact that the rest of their dinner passed with tension and an utter silence that hadn’t been present in their relationship since they first met.
A scoff came next and he just knew it was from the sassy man hiding around the corner. Isaac surprisingly lasted longer than Stiles thought but sooner or later he had to give his input “Well what’s there to think about?”
“Everything Isaac! Every little thing ok-“
“-Stiles”
He sat up with a start, upset that neither of them would even try to see things from his point of view “No! No, no, no. Things are good right now. Things are so very good. I love Derek, and I love my life, and I love the way things are now. And I know, okay, I know people grow and things change, but when they do people can get hurt”
“So that’s what it is? You’re scared?” Isaac dropped his broom finally giving up his rouse. Silence had fallen over the three, Stiles knew his friends would think he was being silly but what he was feeling was real. It was real fear, real uncertainty, and real worry.
The boy finally sat up, his eyes focused on his sweaty palms “What if I say yes and things get bad? Like he doesn’t like the fact that I let my closet explode before I do my laundry? Or that I floss in bed? What if he ends up not being able to stand me? I just…God I just don’t want things to change for the worse”
“Stiles you’ll never know if you don’t at least give it a try”
“What do I do?”
Scott stood with a sigh, patting his friends shoulder with all the intentions of kicking him out “Go, and share these things with your boyfriend, not us”
Stiles went, just not right away. Instead he wasted a half a tank of gas driving with no particular destination. He hated that he was like this, that he’d overthink that he didn’t have the ability to just jump into things without having to go over every worst case scenario. Derek loved him and he loved Derek, that should have been enough.
In the end he just sat in his car port, willing for some realization to come over him.Â
It wasn’t until another two hours later that he finally found some sort of courage to knock on Derek’s door. It took a minute to answer giving Stiles more than enough time to turn away, but he willed himself to stay put.
Soon the light from the pent house seeped passed the opening door revealing Mr. Dark and Lovely himself. Though one could argue that he was not portraying the latter “Hey” Stiles tried, cracking a half smile at his disgruntled looking boyfriend.
“Babe. Hi, I didn’t expect to see you until tomorrow. Is everything ok-“
Stiles was urgent in stepping into the well lit condo. Once the door clicked closed behind him he made it a point to keep his eyes on Derek, and knew if he didn’t get things off his chest then he’d have to psych himself up all over again.
So I’m his own Stiles way he just went in “-I don’t want things to change” Derek showed fear, shock, and everything in between morphed on his face. Stiles realized quickly that he should probably keep talking before Derek got the wrong idea “I am at a point of happiness in my life that I had never for a second thought I would reach. And I’m scared. Every part of me is terrified that this will go wrong and I will lose everything I worked so hard for–we worked so hard for”
“Stiles, wha-what could you lose? What could possibly go wrong?”
Stiles just scoffed not able to help the fact that he had begun to pace “Derek, please don’t make it seem like I’m being irrational”
“I’m not! You barge in here and just start rambling. I just want to know what’s going on in your head”
“If we’re not ready this could set us back, but if we are things could be even more great. And that’s why I hate change, you can never predict the outcome” and that was the truth. It came down to the fact that Stiles couldn’t pin point exactly where they would end once they made it to the other side of this. Somehow though, in the course of trying to get Derek to understand his hesitance he’d forgotten the entire reason he showed up there in the middle of the night “But I am getting off track… What I came here to tell you is that… I want you to come live with me. I know my intro could have been better and it was a bit deceiving but that is my decision. I hate change, and I hate things that scare me but if I have learned anything since I’ve met you it’s that letting fear holding me back has kept me from a lot of really really good things. And my heart tells me this will be a good thing, despite what my head is saying. So the fact that I love you is what I am going to hold on to and hope this goes beautifully”
“I don’t want you doing anything you aren’t ready for Sti, it is a big thing so I-“
“I want this, I do. Because I will never know if I don’t try” Stiles had wiggled his way into Derek’s arms, his heartbeat at a calm for the first time that night “This will be good, at least I will do everything in my power to make sure that it is. Have you started packing yet?”
“I was a hundred percent certain you were coming over here to tell me no, so not really”
“Okay, well we can start in the morning. I kind of tired myself out with all of this”
As if it were nothing Stiles attempted to drift off to the bedroom ready to just pass out for the night, and maybe sleep in well into the morning. But before he could get away from his boyfriend grip Derek was pulling him back in “What is it?”
“What made you change your mind?” Derek was serious, his eyes full of a serious curiosity.
In his sarcastic way Stiles just laughed, and let himself be held “Well I never really made up my mind until now”
“Okay, well what made you finally decide”
“I was sitting in my driveway looking at my house. It was where we first kissed, where I decided to finally commit to you, it’s where a lot of our story has taken place so I just figured it wouldn’t be so bad to continue the next chapter there”
“Wow. That’s a beautiful revelation”
Stiles shrugged, pecking Derek’s lips “I thought so”
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