Two weeks had passed and Evie tried her best to ignore her feelings for Taylor. She knew that she couldn’t ignore her on this tour and she also didn’t want to do so as she still cared for her. The crew had arrived in Kansas City, Kanas the day before and had day off before the next show. Evie tried to distract herself as much as she could and decided to work on music. One good thing about her job was the fact that she could use all her feelings for new songs and that was her mission for the day. Writing songs was like writing in a diary for her; She always felt lighter afterwards. Evie spent the whole morning in her hotel room, wrote down ideas and worked on new melodies. She liked to use a the app “Garage Band” when she wasn’t home in New York City and was able to create sample songs without booking a studio. A lot of her thoughts were not good enough to be put into songs but she managed to record a song idea about her current feelings and also recorded a song that she had already finished writing before the tour. After a productive morning, she decided to get ready for the hotel gym like she often did on day offs when she had more time for herself. As if she had known it, Taylor texted her: “Do you wanna go to the gym?”. They trained together every now and then and Evie always enjoyed Taylors company and it made the time on the treadmill go by really fast. They decided to meet at the gym in 5 minutes and Evie realized again that there was no way for her ignore Taylor.
After a while of strength training they met each other on the tread mills. Walking side by side, they talked about everything and anything. They got along so well and never experienced awkward silences when together. But as much as Evie wanted to feel relaxed, she couldn’t help herself and noticed how she somehow wanted to impress Taylor every now and then. Evie cared about how she looked while they trained and she wanted to make Taylor laugh, not only because her laugh was really cute but also because she wanted Taylor to think that she was fun to be around. How could she make it stop? “I had a long phone call with my mom today. That was much needed because I haven’t seen her in a while. What have you done so far?”, Taylor asked her while they were still walking next to each other staring at the blank wall in front of them. “I actually wrote down some song ideas and recorded a little. I woke up feeling creative so I had to use it haha…”, Evie told Taylor and had to laugh off her sudden nervousness because Taylor didn’t know that she was Evies inspiration. “That’s exciting. Would you mind sharing it with me?”. Taylor looked at Evie with an anticipated look and Evie wasn’t able to say no. They left the gym after their workout and met up in Evies hotel room after they both took a shower to freshen up. Evie knew that she couldn’t show Taylor the song she had written about her. She probably wouldn’t be able to tell that it was about her but Evie was a bad liar and was not sure what she could tell Taylor if she’d asked her about the inspiration. Luckily, she also recorded the other song about her ex-relationship which she had written back in January. “It’s definitely not done yet so don’t take it that seriously…”, Evie began to say to Taylor when she expectantly waited to Evie to show her the recording. The song started playing and filled the room while they both sat on the hotel bed and listened to it. It was a vulnerable moment and Evie felt really unsure of herself because Taylor had been successful with her songwriting long before anyone ever heard about Evie. The song was only three minutes long but it felt like ages until Taylor finally cleared her throat to say something about it. “I’m sorry Evie…”, she just said and seemed to search for more words to say but didn’t. “Why?”. Evie didn’t know what Taylor meant and had expected something else from her. “I am sorry that someone treated you like that.”Â
The song dealt with the last month of her relationship with her ex-boyfriend Dan. He played the keyboards for a less known indie band which performed at the festivals were they had met and dated for a little over a year. He had not cheated on her but had been toxic, talked to other girls and sought female validation and had called Evie “paranoid” for not trusting him anymore.
Evie didn’t know what to say to Taylor but Taylor just continued talking. “You’re so special and no guy deserves you if he acts like this around you. I know you as my friend and I am sure you are the greatest girlfriend someone could ask for. But that guy definitely did not see that.” Taylors words hung in the air and gave Evie mixed feelings. Taylor had said one of the kindest things to her and she felt more than grateful for her support but at the same time she had also made clear that they were nothing else but friends. “Thank you Tay, I did not see that when I wrote that song but that was some time ago and I am in a better place.”, Evie finally managed to say. But was that true? She was indeed not in love with her ex-boyfriend anymore which was definitely good but crushing on a close friend wasn’t really the definition of “a better place”.
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