I entered my bedroom and slung my backpack onto my bed before moving towards my dresser to find a pair of pajamas to wear, along with a pair of trunks to wear underneath them. I then went out into the hall to get a towel from the hallway closet before heading back into my bedroom, then straight into the conjoined bathroom. I locked the door behind me before pulling my sweater up and over my head, along with the shirt that I had worn underneath it. When my upper body was bare, I then untied my pants and shimmied out of them. Lastly, I slipped my trunks down and let them fall to the tiled floor before I turned the lever to the shower and waited for it to warm up. I enjoyed having showers. There was something oddly calming about them. It was almost like warm rain was splattering down on me.
It was peaceful. All of my annoying and recurring thoughts seemed to drip away with every drop of water that fell against my skin.
After showering and dressing into my pajamas, I walked downstairs and entered the kitchen, stopping when I saw Grayson seated on the stool behind the counter.
Where the hell is Mitchell?
And where the hell are my parents??
He looked up as I entered, causing my cheeks to turn red with embarrassment.
I can’t do this.
“Shit, I just remembered that I have to be somewhere.” I turned around and hastily ran back upstairs. I knocked on my parents bedroom door, but there was no answer.
I turned and walked towards Mitchell’s room and knocked on his door. “Mitchell!” I shouted.
No answer.
Where the hell are they?
I headed to my room and searched for my phone on my bed so that I could text my family and see where the hell they were.
But, of course, it was dead.
I should’ve thrown it on charge when I first got home.
I quickly reached over to my bedside table for my iPhone charger and plugged my phone in, waiting patiently for it to charge.
Maybe they went out to get dinner?
But that still doesn’t explain why Grayson was left in my house, alone.
I slumped down in my bed, my head rested comfortably against my pillow.
I inhaled a deep breath, looking up at the ceiling before calmly releasing it. I closed my eyes, my thoughts racing through my mind.
“Sorry for the black eye.” His voice came off as calm and sincere.
My eyes shot open as I quickly sat up, my heart beginning to race. What the fuck is he doing in my room? And how did I not hear him enter? I didn’t respond, honestly my entire body felt as if it were freezing up. My hands were literally sweating right now, and there was a knot twisting inside of my stomach.
“Are you ignoring me?” He raised an eyebrow.
Again, I didn’t respond.
“Maybe we should talk….about the kiss?”
This is fucking mortifying.
“I don’t like y-“
“Just leave me alone!” I groaned, interrupting whatever ‘I am straight‘ speech he was about to deliver.
His eyes widened at my outburst.
“Forget it ever happened, okay? It shouldn’t have happened. I was drunk and I probably thought you were someone else. I mean, why would I ever intentionally kiss someone that I hate?”
“Wait, you hate me?” He wondered, his eyebrows knitted together.
I inhaled deeply to calm myself down, and hopefully to slow the beating of my palpitating heart.
“Look, it was just a stupid, drunken mistake. Okay?”
After a short moment of silence, he finally spoke. “Okay..” His voice was stoic.
“Thank god, I thought you might’ve had a little crush on me or something.” He said, his lips forming into a smirk.
I scoffed. “You wish.”
“Are you sure you don’t?” His eyebrows quirked with amusement as he took a step toward me.
“What?”
“You know, there’s a saying. That our true feelings reveal themselves when we’re drunk. Perhaps you kissing me was your drunk self telling you that you like me.” He took another step closer. He was amused by this.
“You’re so full of yourself.” I scoffed.
“Tell me I’m wrong.”
“You are wrong. You’re also a pain in the ass, and possibly one of the most annoying people I have ever met. Honestly, how could anyone ever like you.” I was so fast with my words that I felt a little lightheaded.
He seemed taken aback by my response.
“Just get out, please.”
He scratched at his eyebrow as he slowly retreated from my bedroom.
I am not gay.
I can’t be, I mean, just because I happened to kiss Grayson Scott of all people whilst I was drunk, it didn’t mean that it meant anything. It was just a dumb kiss, a idiotic spur of the moment kiss.
My phone turned on beside me, and I quickly reached over for it.
Maybe I should ask google what my sexuality is, seeing as google apparently seems to know everything.
I googled ‘sexuality test’ and let the results come through.
There were a dozen sites listed below.
I clicked on the first one.
Do you identify as a:
A, Man.
B, Woman.
C, Other.
I clicked A, for obvious reasons.
What would your ideal partner be if you two are going to spend a weekend on an island?
A, Opposite sex.
B, Same sex.
C, Either.
D, I’ve never considered it.
I clicked D. I mean, who considers this type of shit?
Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex?
A, Yes and I enjoyed it.
B, Yes but I was drunk/it was a dare.
C, Yes but I didn’t enjoy it.
D, Never.
I clicked on B.
When considering only the body, which is more objectively attractive in your opinion?
A, My own gender.
B, The opposite gender.
C, Both.
D, Neither.
Hmm. I’m not entirely sure about this one. I mean, I’ve never found anyone to be that attractive when only considering their body.
I answered with C.
Do you like the idea of kissing someone, male or female?
A, Yes that sounds nice.
B, No that makes me uncomfortable.
C, I feel completely neutral on the subject.
I answered with A. Kissing anyone but Grayson would be considered a good feat.
Have you ever experienced sexual attraction?
A, All the time.
B, Once or twice.
C, Never.
D, I’m unsure what it means.
I answered with C. I’ve never had a sexual attraction to anybody in my life.
How do you feel when you see actors/actresses kissing on screen?
A, If it’s a straight couple, it’s fine. But it makes me uncomfortable to see gay couples kissing.
B, If it’s a gay couple, it’s fine. But it makes me uncomfortable to see straight couples kissing.
C, It doesn’t bother me either way.
D, It makes me uncomfortable to see anyone kissing.
C was my answer again.
After completing the remaining questions the results came in.
Apparently I’m somewhere between being a Homosexual and Heterosexual, but am mostly considered to be Asexual.
Well, that’s just confusing.
I deleted the browser tab and turned off my phone before setting it back on my bedside table.
Thanks for nothing, stupid sexuality test.
“Dinner!” I heard my father’s bellow.
Thank goodness, I was afraid I was about to starve to death.
Maybe I am asexual.
I mean, I like the idea of romance, but I’ve always felt uncomfortable with the idea of having sex. That’s not to say that I won’t someday have it.
Can’t knock it until I try it, right?
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