Atlas Toren -46-

Atlas POV

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The car ride was silent. Magnus kept sending my worried glances, as if he was going to say something. I didn’t dare look at him. Just kept a tired gaze out the window. “I- I’m sorry. I didn’t know…” He bit his lip as he trailed off, and I heard the car pull up, before looking at him. 

“He didn’t- you know, fuck you or anythi-“

“No. But he- Cyrus-“

Mags went more silent that before, and then got out of the car. I made to move too, but he sent me a look. So I stayed. And watched as he walked around to my side of the car, and opened the door. Strong arms wrapped around me, and I melted into his chest a little. “I’m sorry.” He murmured.

“It’s… okay. I may have broken your ‘don’t hurt him’ rule though.”

He chuckled, a welcoming sound, and we both turned to see the others running out the door. “Mags! Atlas! How was-“

“Hi Atlas-“

“Mags what-“

“What happened?”

“Are you oka-“

Magnus cleared his throat, and everyone fell silent. I glanced around. Before seeing Arlo stride towards us. I coughed a little, averting my gaze as his eyes ran over me, darkening. 

“You had better have beat him until he’s fucking unrecognisable kitten” He muttered, placing a small kiss on my forehead, and doing the same to Mags. I nodded.

“He’s better off dead at this point. I have footage I can show you,”

Arlo made a small noise of approval. “Good.”,

“Atlas? What happened?” Cyrus’s quiet voice spoke out, and I glanced over to him, eyes warming.

“Don’t worry about it,” I murmured, before jumping out of Mags’s arms, and walking over to him. I came to a stop as he tilted his head to look up at me. “Okay.” He mumbled, and I gave him a small smile.

“You- you were-“

My eyes rounded on Niko as he tried to form words, and he sent me a questioning gaze. One in which I returned. His face morphed into one of confusion, and I chuckled. “Can we go inside now? It’s fucking cold.” I commented, and they all nodded, following me as I headed inside.

“I’m uh- I’m assuming Cyrus won’t be going next week,” I murmured over to Mags, and he sat down on my bed with a questionable gaze. The quiet chatter of the other’s finishing dinner was drowned out as I yawned.

 “Did Marco talk of him?” Magnus’s tone was soft, but there was a dangerous glint in his eye, and he had tensed. I placed my hand over his. 

“He uh- just- just watch the video.”

Magnus grimaced at the mention of there being a tape, before nodding slowly. “Can… can I show the others?”

I looked at the ground, where a small puddle of water from my shower had pooled. My reflection wavered a little, and my green eyes peeked out from my hair. “I’d prefer it if no one watched it. But… yeah. Okay.” I mumbled, and Mags made a small sound of approval.

“Alright.” He hummed, before tucking the blankets around me. “You need to sleep.” He whispered, and I sent him an amused look. “Alright.” I yawned, blinking sleepily as he shut the door behind him.

I blinked sleepily once more as light peeked in from the windows, and groaned a little. Throwing the blankets off me, I went to the bathroom to change, stopping at my reflection in the mirror. I shivered as I traced the bruises Marco had left.

Bitch was almost dead now though, so fuck him. And my memory of him.

I held my head up as I went downstairs, and looked boredly around at the staring faces. “What.” I grumbled.

“And here I was thinking you might change a little.” Riftyn snickered, and I narrowed my eyes.

“And here I was thinking the same.” I glowered, and he sent me a glare. Ignoring him, I sat down at the table, putting a piece of toast on my plate, looking up as Magnus put another. “Just one more,” He murmured, and I sighed, before nodding.

“Th- thanks Atlas,” Cyrus squeaked out.

“For what.” I raised my eyebrows.

“I- uh- saw the video. He- he was going to-“

“Yeah. I know. And I beat him up so fucking hard he won’t even remember his name. That dipshit isn’t going anywhere near us.” I muttered disdainfully, pushing the memory of out my head.

I glanced around the table with a bored expression, and the others took the hint, resuming in the frequent chatter that filled the house. Magnus nudged me with his elbow as I finished my second piece of toast. “Are you sure you’re okay?” He whispered.

“No.” I whispered back, rolling my eyes at his concerned expression. “Mags, I’ll be fine. I always am. You should know this by now. I won’t even know when I’m finally okay. I never know,” I murmured, and he glanced down the table, humming a little with a saddened tone. 

“Okay. We’re here for you.”

“I know Magnus.” I sighed.

“Yeah well, last time I told you that you didn’t listen.” He muttered, and I watched as his gaze darkened. 

“Magnus- please-“

“No- Atlas, I don’t think you’re fully understanding-“

“Mags-”

Our voices had raised a little and my eyes were narrowed as he clenched his fists. “No- you’re not fucking alone anymore. You can’t act like everything’s fine when its not. We’re here. And we’re fucking worried. So can you just fucking tell me if you’re okay or not?”

He let out a loud sigh, and my gaze fixed on the table as I tensed. His shoulders drooped when he noticed. “Mags- I know what you’re trying to say.”

“No, you don’t Atlas-” He broke in, and I sighed.

“Mags I don’t fucking know when I’m okay. I don’t know when I’m fucking happy. Or sad. And I’m sorry that I can’t make fucking sense of this shit, but ignoring it, and blanking out is the easiest way to get past this.”

Magnus’s gaze stayed on me, scanning over my face as my eyes darkened. “You don’t… you don’t know?”

“Know what?” I asked, tone frustrated.

“You don’t know what you feel?” He whispered.

“No Mags I fucking don’t. I can’t make sense of any of it. All I know is that I fucking love you all. And that’s it. But everything always seems so fucking pointless and insignificant that I can’t tell when I’m properly, actually happy.”

Magnus’s gaze looked saddened, and I unclenched my fists, ignoring the silence around us. “I’m sorry.” He breathed, and I glanced at him.

“I… I know. I am too.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“We are not going through this again.”

Magnus looked like he wanted to say something, but instead, clapped his hands. The boys moved, but nobody spoke. “I’ll just have to show you then. You have significance. And so do we. It doesn’t matter if we mean nothing to rest of the world. Because we mean something to each other.” He whispered, and I fell silent, before putting my plate over to the washing up.

“We’ll get through this with you.” He murmured. “Together.”

I nodded a little, before glancing up as Milo walked towards us both. “We’re uh- having a movie day. you… you coming with?” he asked, voice hesitant, and Magnus nodded quickly, for the both of us.

“Yeah- we’ll come.” He agreed, sending me a warm look, before we both walked upstairs. Before going into Colten’s room, I darted into mine, grabbing my beads and trinkets. Walking into Colten’s room, Cyrus eyes flickered down to my hands. 

“Are you going to make another bracelet?” he exclaimed excitedly, and I raised my eyebrows at his enthusiasm. 

“Yeah.” I deadpanned. “What’re your favourite colours?” Cyrus’s eyes widened, before he thought for a bit.

“Red and yellow!”

I nodded to myself, sitting myself down on a bed, not glancing up as everyone else came in. My fingers fiddled around with the trinkets, and I found a small Winnie the Pooh charm, slipping it onto the string. 

No one came over to me as I arranged the beads, and I heard some movie start playing in the background. I glanced up to see Good Will Hunting playing, raising my eyebrows.

Yawning a little, I decided I would join them, and I left the bracelet on the bed as I wandered over.

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A/N

ik that this is a kinda confusing, or boring chpt, but tysm for reading <3

i think i want to right smth about Cyrus and someone else next chapter, so look forward to that :0

here’s some tea (。・・)_🍵,

Kasumi <3