He flailed into a sitting position, feeling sweat drip down the back of his neck. That wasn’t how he remembered it happening. Actually, he hadn’t even remembered assaulting the second man! That part was blank in his mind. Before, all he could remember was coming to his senses and finding the man dead under him, and a trembling Naruto sobbing behind him.
Now… He grit his teeth in disbelief. Who would have thought it had such a strong effect on him even when he was younger? But, somehow, he was glad that it happened. If it didn’t… He shuddered at the thought. He would have died and Naruto would have been left alone… with the man.
A wave of disgust went down his spine and his eyes twitched in anger. People… they had always hated them. Before all this happened, Akashi hadn’t even known about the fox, but they still hated them! Two little children! Defenceless! And to think they would go to those measures.
To the point of attempted rape…
That was what made him hate them.
That was what made him despise them.
They wanted to hurt him… they wanted to hurt Naruto.
He was brought out of his thoughts when the name flashed inside his mind. Naruto… The apartment felt cold without him. Akashi felt cold. Is that how he was going to feel even after Naruto leaves? Or is it going to get worse? Just imagining it felt unreal. To think that one day he would come back home, and Naruto wouldn’t be there.
No annoying snoring… No whining in the morning… No breaking the alarm clock… No laughter… No bright smiles… No dumb grins… No cup ramen lying around on the ground…
No Naruto.
His arms slowly winded up around him, tightly holding on for dear life. He was already cold. Already alone. It wasn’t long before Naruto would leave… and Akashi would be left here, in their home, in solitude.
Fingers clenched around the fabric of his shirt, digging into the soft material. He curled into himself, knees coming to rest under his chin and then… the first tremble came. After that, he couldn’t control his own body. Silent sobs wrecked his lithe form.
It hurt.
It hurt.
It hurt.
It hurt.
But… what hurt even more, was the fact that the tears wouldn’t come. He sobbed and he sobbed and he sobbed, but his eyes remained dry. The tears remained unshed.
Was this his punishment?
No matter how much his body hurt… how much his soul hurt, was there no way to let it all out?
Was there no way to empty himself from all the pain and despair?
Was he meant to keep it all inside?
Was this his punishment?
To forever remain in this state of anguish?
_
Days passed…
He sobbed.
Days passed…
No tears fell.
Days passed…
He didn’t speak with Naruto.
Days passed…
And they just continued passing.
_
When the day came, Akashi didn’t know whether he should laugh or cry.
But, he knew he was unable to do either.
He wished to ignore Naruto as much as possible, he wished he hadn’t had to see him leave.
Fate had different plans.
_
The time had arrived. Akashi knew it as soon as the front door clicked open. He could sense it in his Chakra. He had come, just so he could leave.
Akashi didn’t move to greet him, he stayed seated on his bed, blankly staring at the doorknob. Then, as it twisted to the side, his breathing stopped.
It opened wide, revealing the person he didn’t wish to see.
Naruto.
The said boy stopped at the door, a disquieting expression taking place on his face. At Akashi’s silence, he stepped in and the door clicked shut behind him. “Nii-chan, lis-“. Before he could finish, just as he turned around, an alarm clock shattered next to his head.
He flinched, covering his head with his arms in an attempt to shield himself. The metal pieces didn’t touch him. He glanced to the side and saw that the wall had broken off from the hit, crumbling to the ground next to his feet. Carefully peering at his brother, he saw nothing in his eyes. He opened his mouth to speak, but as Akashi raised his hand, he stopped.
“Leave”. The redhead had commanded, leaving no room for argument. “Pack up your things and leave”. Naruto fumbled with his fingers, feeling like he had made a mistake, his thoughts were interrupted by a yell. “I said leave!” The chair came flying next, slamming into the ground next to him and breaking into pieces.
Naruto took a step back in fright. Was this really his brother? The one who said it was ’till the end of the line? The one who protected him with all his might? He looked at the boy who sat before him. His feet were up on the bed, forearms resting on his knees, hands dangling between them.
This looked nothing like his brother.
“Why?” Naruto found himself asking, feeling his throat close up. Was this how things were supposed to end? Was this how he was supposed to leave him? If he was left like that… Naruto was afraid he was going to self-destruct. Akashi was never calm on the inside, he always hid things… he always let his anger get the best of him. That’s how he was in the academy.
That was how he was now.
“Please… just tell me”. Akashi remained silent, not even a spark of recognition in his eyes, not even a spark of that warmth he always had when he looked at Naruto. Absolutely nothing.
“I have nothing to tell you, pack your things and leave… I won’t repeat myself again”. Naruto swallowed at his words, feeling his heart speed up. He can’t go like this. He can’t. So he did the only thing he knew he could in that moment. He walked up to the bed and stopped in front of his brother.
Feeling his hands twitch, he raised them up and towards Akashi.
The creaking of the bed was the last thing he heard, before his back harshly slammed into the door and a hand wrapped around his neck. “I told you to leave! Why do you never listen to me?! Does it bring you some kind of twisted joy to see me like this?! Why don’t you just go and leave me to wallow in my own self-pity?!” With each word, the pressure around his neck got stronger.
Then, all of a sudden, a sob resounded in front of him, and the pressure instantly disappeared. He watched as Akashi, on wobbly legs, stumbled back onto the bed. Naruto let out a cough at the raw feeling of his throat. Stumbling forward, he dropped onto his knees in front of Akashi.
“I’m sorry”. He whispered, resting his forehead on Akashi’s knee. He really was sorry… but he had to do this… he needed to get stronger. Sasuke wasn’t the only reason… he wanted to get strong for himself, so he would never have to be protected again. A tremble came as an immediate response.
“No, no you’re not”. His voice faltered, cracking at the last word. “You’re a liar”. He accused, pushing Naruto’s head away. His younger brother’s baby blue eyes glistened with unshed tears, but in that moment, he didn’t care. “We promised, didn’t we? That day… with the sunset as our witness, we promised ’till the end of the line”. He lifted Naruto’s chin and looked him in the eyes.
“So why are you doing this to me? The line hasn’t ended yet… so why are you trying to end it yourself?” Naruto couldn’t keep it in anymore. He whimpered, a sob escaping his lips. He looked away, letting the tears fall onto the hard wood underneath them. Was that what he was doing? Ending the line? He pushed away from Akashi and took a step away.
“I’m sorry”. He turned around and grabbed his backpack, hurriedly stuffing the necessary things inside it. Casting one last look at Akashi, he breathed out and glanced away, opening the door and closing it behind himself. He rushed to put on his ninja sandals, before running out of the front door, almost slamming it shut.
When Akashi heard the click of the last door, he wrapped his arms around his knees and lowered his head onto them.
“Liar”. He whispered into the empty home.
_
He didn’t know how long he stayed inside the room. Not eating. Not sleeping.
Was it minutes? Hours? Days? He didn’t know. He didn’t bother checking.
He planned to stay in his bed until the day death decided to take him, but, someone had to ruin his plans. Knocks resounded through his dark apartment, and he forced himself to get up. He sluggishly walked to the front door, already knowing who was there.
The door was swung open and he stared at the person. “Yo!” Kakashi raised his hand in a greeting. “May I come in?” He asked, his signature eye-smile present. Finding no will in himself to argue, Akashi turned around and walked away, leaving the door open as his inaudible reply.
The door clicked shut when he sat down on the couch. The silver-haired man came over to him and dropped next to him. “It’s been days since Naruto left… why haven’t you gone out”. So it had been days… he really wasn’t keeping track of time. He didn’t say anything in reply. Hearing the man sigh, he glanced at him. “This isn’t healthy…”. He stayed quiet.
“You know… you remind me of myself when I was younger”. Kakashi admitted, but Akashi didn’t seem interested at all in his words. “When I lost everything, I completely broke away from everyone else”. He continued and looked up at the ceiling, remembering the old memories. “For a while, things were rough, so I understand how you’re feeling”. He peered at the boy beside him as he said that.
“You understand nothing”. He heard him whisper in a trembling voice. He noticed his hands were gripping the fabric of his pants. His hands were turned white by the pressure of the hold he had. “Do you know what it’s like to feel anguish, but not be able to cry?” The boy besides him asked, and his heart throbbed in return. He did. “Do you know what it’s like to feel hatred, but not be able to scream out?” He continued and Kakashi felt his heart break further.
He did.
“Do you know what it’s like to feel nothing and everything, all at the same time?” He did. Akashi stopped for a moment. “I’ve felt it all in one dreadful moment and now I don’t wish to feel anymore”. He finished and the older man didn’t know what to say to all of that. The Akashi next to him, was different than the Akashi a month ago and he knew why.
He understood it on a personal level. Kakashi had people he cared about when he was younger. He had them for years. Then, one by one, he lost them. He understood how it felt when a person who’s been by your side for years, just disappeared from your life. But… Naruto is alive and Akashi should be glad. Kakashi no longer has anyone.
“I do know… As much as it pains me to say it, I do”. The redhead’s gaze snapped to him, pinning him in place. “But I found an outlet for all of the feelings I carried inside of me”. Kakashi wasn’t sure if he should even mention this in front of the boy, in fright of him following in the same footsteps.
But, as he remembered the boy’s words from way before, he decided it wouldn’t do any harm.
“I joined the ANBU”. He was positive Akashi wouldn’t have any reaction to his words…
He was wrong.
“The ANBU?” He heard the boy ask, his brows furrowing at the question. “You were in the ANBU?” He clarified, shifting to face Kakashi. It was in that moment, that Kakashi knew, he made a mistake of mentioning it to him at all. “How does one join the ANBU?” He rephrased his question, eyes staring directly into Kakashi’s one, visible eye.
Does he lie? Does he tell the truth?
He went with the latter.
“You don’t join it, they recruit you”. He admitted. He chose the truth, because he knew the boy would know if he lied. That Chakra sensing of his was tricky to say the least. Akashi tilted his head, confusion written all over his face. “It doesn’t matter if you’re a Genin, Chunin, Jounin… If they find your skills useful, you will be asked to join”. He clarified.
“Oh…”. That was the boy’s reply, before he simply turned away in, what seemed like, disinterest. “Is that all you’ve come to tell me? If so, please leave, I wish to sleep”. He stood up, gesturing at the door. Sighing, Kakashi followed him to the front door. The boy opened it and Kakashi walked through.
“Goodbye, sensei”. Kakashi nodded and the door closed, shutting Akashi away from the rest of the world.
Kakashi turned around, but glanced back as he remembered that one moment.
That one moment of interest that flashed through the boy’s eyes at the mention of ‘ANBU’.
He wondered if he’d made a mistake.
_
When Akashi closed the door, he leaned his forehead against it, enjoying the feeling of the cool wood on his skin. ANBU. It was a special ninja force that he’s seen quite a lot throughout his life in the village. He didn’t know a lot about them, just that they strictly follow the orders of the Hokage. Bitterness filled him when Tsunade’s face flashed inside his mind.
He leaned back and took a few steps away from the door. He didn’t know what to do now. Sasuke was gone… Naruto was gone. Sakura was studying under the Hokage as a medic and Kakashi was busy with missions of his own. He didn’t know what to do now. So he did the only thing he could.
He waited until he could no longer feel Kakashi’s Chakra and pulled on his ninja sandals.
If there was a way of him getting into ANBU, it was through the Hokage.
_
“Denied!”. Tsunade slammed her hand on the desk, a furious expression darkening her features. “Join the ANBU? You’re a child! And you’re still suspended!” She named the reasons for denying him. Akashi patiently waited until she cooled off a little.
“Wasn’t Uchiha Itachi 11 when he joined the ANBU? And you can lift the suspension, it’s really not that hard”. An expression of pure disbelief took place on Tsunade’s face. Was this brat serious? Why in the world would he want to join ANBU? Just as the thought went through her mind, she realized.
Naruto had left the village with Jiraiya.
Even if she didn’t know Akashi very well, she could already see.
He was struck hard by Naruto’s leave.
And judging by his expressionless face, it had struck him very hard.
He stood still… patiently… calmly… It was weird. She couldn’t really explain it, but it was weird. He was so unlike his mother, even if he looked like her. The situation was the same with Naruto. She noticed that it was the only thing the twins had in common.
She went back to the subject at hand. She had went off track.
What did the boy have to offer her? She knew nothing of his abilities, so she decided to ask. “If I let you join ANBU, and that’s only an if, what would you have to offer? What skills would make you unique enough to recruit?” She watched as the boy didn’t move a muscle, before he spoke.
“Since I am a descendant of the Uzumaki Clan, my Chakra reserves are bigger than that of a lower-ranked Jounin. I know medical techniques on an advanced level and my cell regeneration is unmatched. I discovered that I can summon the Adamantine Sealing Chains at will. I am also no stranger to the usage of seals”. His monotone voice resounded clearly through her office, but she could barely think at that moment.
The boy knows of the Uzumaki Clan, knows of their unique abilities, knows medical techniques, knows how to use seals and to top it all off… He had the Adamantine Sealing Chains.
There was just one small problem. He was also a Jinchuriki. He had a Tailed Beast sealed within himself, more specifically, the strongest of them all. The Nine-Tails.
Jiraiya had informed her that he had strengthened the seal which held the beast, but she was still worried.
“I can imagine you are quite surprised at my abilities, but you are frightened by the fact that I carry the Nine-Tails as well”. Her eyes widened in disbelief. Was he reading her mind? What sort of trickery was this?
“I’m not reading your mind, I apologize for making it seem that way”. Her surprise increased tenfold at his unusual politeness. He had no problems telling her she didn’t belong here before, so why was he acting like this now? Was it to get on her good side? So she would let him join ANBU?
“I have failed to mention my most used ability… Chakra Sensing, which means, I can sense each shift in your Chakra, including how your emotions influence it, consequently, that makes me know your current emotional state…”, he trailed off, a humorless grin raising to his face, “… and it tells me you have already made up your mind”. Tsunade froze in her seat.
He was right… she had already made up her mind.
It was then, that she realized two things.
One. The boy could be terrifying if he wished so.
Two. He will be a frightening addition to the ANBU.
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