(Hockey Bxb) Whistle In The Wind -𝐗𝐈-

╔══《”‘Cause if I say I miss you,》══╗
 I know that you won’t.”

       The first time Váli was slapped, he was four. That day, he had gone to preschool like any other. In class, the students had been assigned to draw family portraits. On Váli’ sheet of white construction paper, were four poorly drawn stick figures.

       In the center was a tall man, with a scribble of hair and a smiley face. Next to the man was a slightly shorter woman. She wore a triangle for a dress, and had straight, short hair. On her face, Váli had drawn a neutral expression. She was neither smiling nor frowning.

       On the outside, Vál drew two small kids. The one next to his dad was him. He had a big smile on his face, and he was drawn in light blue crayon. Next to his mother was Aksel. He was drawn in orange crayon, and he holding his mothers makeshift hand.

       Above them, he had drawn a big sun and a rainbow. It was a happy family portrait.

       When Váli had gotten home that day from preschool, he raced inside holding the paper to his chest. Smiling huge, he anticipated showing his family. They’ll love the picture! He cheered to himself. Laughing and skipping, he ran past the kitchen and headed for his mothers office.

       The door was big and scary, and in any other circumstance Váli avoided it. The number of times the small child had been in the room could be counted on one hand. However, Váli didn’t hesitate this day. Overflowing with excitement, he reached to grab the handle, and opened the heavy door with a weak pull.

       Too distracted with his racing thoughts, Váli didn’t register voices behind the door until he was sprinting in the room. Inside, his mother sat against her desk. Her phone was held at her ear, and her other hand was gripping her forehead.

       She was mad, visibly. Sweat shone on her glossy skin, and the sleeves of her baby blue button up were crinkled by her elbows. Her flats were kicked off, and her hair was tied back. At that moment, Váli was like a plump rabbit that had hopped willingly into a hungry lion’s den.

       In a rage, Váli’s mother whipped around to see who dared to interrupt her business call. Looking down, her beady eyes met Vál’s innocent ones.

       By now, he was gripping the paper so hard the edges were crinkled. Standing in the middle of the room, Váli felt as crumpled as his stick figure on the sheet  was. His stomach churned, and his eyes went dry.

       Despite his fear, Váli held the paper up with shaky hands, showing his mother his masterpiece. Angered, she ripped the paper harshly from his weak hands. Not taking a second to glance at the artwork, she crumpled it up and threw it aggressively back at her son. The wad of paper hit Váli square in the chest.

       The ball hit Váli with enough force to cause him to stumble back, his frail body not prepared for the throw. In the blink of an eye, his mother had slammed her phone on the desk, stood up straight and walked right up to Vál. Before he could even take his eyes off the floor, Váli’s head was whipped around. In a single moment, his gaze went from the floor in front of him, to black, to the far wall on his right.

       A ringing in his ear came after, following the thwack of skin on skin. Immediately, Váli began to tremble. Tears welled up in his bleary eyes, but he didn’t dare turn his head to look at his mother. All at once, all five senses overwhelmed Vál. He was confused.

       The loud ringing continued to get louder and louder, the room began to wiggle and distort, the iron taste of blood filled his mouth, the smell of cigarette smoke invaded his nostrils, and in the next moment–

       “Can’t you tell when someone’s busy!” his mother boomed before shoving Váli back.

       The itchy carpet met his hands as he fell on his butt. Suddenly, his head was pounding and his mind went blank as he lost complete balance. When he awoke much later, he was back in his room, snuggled under the covers.

…

       “Aksel guess what!” Lucien cheered as he swung the passenger car door open. Aksel, who was already settled into the seat behind the wheel, jumped from the sudden intervention. Trailing behind the excited Lucien, Váli slipped quietly into his seat in the back. All the while, Aksel turned the volume dial down on the music playing over the car speakers.

        “Chicken butt,” Aksel grinned, both boys cracking up into child-like laughter. From the backseat, Váli watched the immature boys in admiration.

       “Okay but, for real, though. Guess!” Luc huffed, catching his breath.

       “Mmm…did you get in trouble for sleeping in class?” Aksel guessed.

       “Hey! I do not get in trouble for sleeping…that much!” Lucien defended. “You’re also wrong! I got an 82 on my math test,” Lucien cheered.

       “Aye! Good job, man,” Aksel congratulated him, smiling hugely. Aksel turned his body toward the back, while adding, “I’m sure our genius in the back got at least ten more percentage points than you, though. He has a talent for that sort of thing.”

       “I got a 98…” Váli weakly replied. The cheering paused, the car going silent for a second.

       “Damn Váli! That’s so good,” Aksel hooted, Lucien joining in on the applause. The car was lively, the energy never wearing off even as Aksel started the engine and exited the parking spot. Now on the road, with the windows rolled down, Váli found himself closing his eyes.

       The wind rushed through his hair, and the laughter from the front seat became drowned out. This is peace. Caught in the moment, Váli relaxed his face enough for a small smile to contort his cheeks. His eyes scrunched ever so slightly, and the furrow in his eyebrow relaxed the smallest amount.

       To the naked eye, this would look no different. But to Lucien, he was left awestruck. If Váli had been listening properly, he would’ve heard only Aksel’s noisy hollering–Lucien having stopped talking, his attention elsewhere. He had innocently turned to look at Aksel, but stopped short.

        With his head half turned, and his mouth still open mid laugh, he watched Váli at peace. He realized, in that moment, that this was the calmest he’d ever seen Vál. For as long as he could remember, Váli was always tensed. If you brushed by him, one could feel the rigidness of his shoulders. It was as if his joints screamed for relief that never came.

       In this moment, in the chill of December, Váli looked at peace. The image, which was now imprinted in Lucien’s mind, sent a rush through his body. Sitting up in his seat, Luc tried to tune back into Aksel’s one sided conversation. A distraction. He needed a distraction, he was convinced.

       If I can just avoid this, it’ll go away. He told himself, running a nervous hand through his hair. His fingers got caught on a loc of hair, and he winced when he ripped his finger through it. Scoffing to himself, he wondered if the serene boy resting his eyes behind him knew his peace had caused this chaos.

       At some point throughout the car ride, Aksel had decided, for himself, that he would go over to Lucien’s house after school. ‘We can do school work!’ He claimed. Lucien had rolled his eyes at that, knowing they would end up on the couch playing video games.

       The decision, made entirely by Aksel but had no complaints from Luc, led the red truck to the Lien household first. “Bye Váli!” Aksel called to his brother, dropping him off in the driveway. Scrambling to get out of the car, Vál smiled and waved back. Up the steps, across the porch, and to the door. Lucien watched Váli’s movements, even as Aksel reached for the clutch.

       Váli opened the door, pausing before entering. Taking one glance back, he immediately met the eyes of Luc. As the truck reversed out of the driveway, their gazes held in tension. Lucien found himself looking at Váli’s tight shoulders. The urge to run out of the car and give him a massage right there and then became overwhelming.

       His fingers twitched, almost reaching for the door handle. Before he could begin to move, Váli turned his body and bolted into the door. Lucien stared at where he once was, his gaze going cold.

       Váli, now with his back to the closed door, breathed in deeply. It was five seconds of eye contact, stop being so socially awkward. He told himself, blaming the interaction on anxiety. He had always struggled with the issue. Certain settings had the power to clog his throat, preventing him from getting a breath in.

       This felt different, though. As he stood there, he was breathing just fine. In fact, he noted that the breaths were deep, and resonated cavernously in his lungs. It felt like every inhalation he had ever taken previously in his life was muffled, and now he was truly breathing for the first time. 

       His mind began to slow down, registering the implication of this. If it wasn’t his breathing tricking his mind into thinking this was anxiety, then what was? Even as he thought this, he knew. His heart hadn’t stopped racing since he had slammed the door behind him.

       By now, he had been standing there, stagnant, for over five minutes. The ticking of a grandfather clock indicated each passing second. His back ached from his heavy backpack. His body was shivering from the winter air. Yet, Váli didn’t move from the entryway.

       His heart was beating the same way it did around danger. He experienced the same phenomenon the previous night. Right now, he didn’t feel scared, and that realization terrified him. The drumming of his heart wasn’t associated with the feeling he was familiar with. This lack of control and familiarity petrified him.

       Clack. Váli halted, his thoughts stopping in their place. The clicking of high heels echoed throughout the house. The tile floors amplified the sound. I forgot I’m not alone. Váli panicked. 

       If Váli wasn’t scared earlier, he definitely was now. His heart had begun to pound twice as fast. Before he could even process what was happening, Vális’ feet had moved on their own, carrying his body quickly up the stairs and to his room. His ankle had forgotten it was injured, adrenaline blocking out all pain.

       Once he was in his room, with the door closed tight, the darkness encompassed him. His exhales came in short pants as he regained his breath. He had managed to avoid his mother for now, but he knew it was inevitable. He would have to face her today, alone. 

       Now sweating, Váli made the decision to shower, knowing the slick feeling of sweat on the back of his neck wouldn’t go away if he didn’t. To prepare for the shower, Váli scurried around his room frantically.

       Pajama pants, a hoodie, a pair of underwear and a pair of socks, a towel... he counted to himself. What else do I need? Grabbing a hair brush on his dresser, Váli looked around the messy room. Clothes coated the entire floor, leaving no openings for the hard wood floor to be shown.

       The walls were white and simple, undecorated. His bed was even more plain, sporting simple sheets and blankets. On the floor near his bed, Váli’s eyes got caught on a discarded stuffed animal. 

       It must’ve gotten kicked off the bed at some point, Váli knowing he moved a lot in his sleep. Walking over, he bent down to pick it up. The cat looked sad and droopy. The calico fur had become matted in certain areas due to age and use. 

       Váli remembered when he first got it. Aksel had given it to him. He was just 8 years old when their childhood cat Mimi had died. Growing up, Vál had loved the cat, forming a connection with her. Mimi would sleep in Váli’s bed, and follow him around the house.

       Her coat was shiny and soft, and Váli would take care of her. Feeding her, teaching her skills, cleaning her litter box. Mimi was everything to Váli, and Váli was everything to Mimi. 

       One day, she had wandered out of the front door when Váli was distracted. By the time he had noticed, a car had already hit her. The bloodied body was forever engraved in his brain. As a gift, Aksel had given him the stuffed animal. Looking at it now, Váli felt a twinge of sadness.

       That day, he felt the connection snap in him. He hadn’t felt it since. Not with his mother, not with Aksel, not with himself. Staring at the beaded eyes, Váli sighed, gently placing the cat back on his bed.

       Reaching for the items he previously discarded, Váli headed for the door. Once in the hallway, he turned to his bathroom. With his hand on the doorknob, he was stopped by a voice.

       “Hei, gutten min. Jeg ser at broren din ikke er hjemme i kveld (Hello son. I see your brother is not home this evening).”

Question of the chapter: Is your room usually messy or clean?

╚══《Word count- 2,244》══╝

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