Love On Ice // Bang Chan (Skz) – Male Oc Part 8

The show got closer day by day and the boys all had a special photoshoot even for the promotional material for the show and with the help of Mr. Kim and Daehun as well as Seungho from time to time they all learned their programs quite easily.

Seungho was a little busy though, he was practicing his own program which he picked from the notebook where he made programs with his old coach, and then he and Chan also had to work on their pair program.

It wasn’t going well since Seungho couldn’t get himself to open up, he knew Chan would support him but in the end, he was still not ready to actually face mother and what she did to him, he wasn’t sure if he could face the old memories he buried away for that long.

Today the boys had a schedule and Seungho was slaving the day away at the rink, he worked since early the morning he wanted to get something done but he was frustrated with himself.

At one point a familiar voice called pulling him out of his self-pity trance and when he looked to the direction of the voice he saw his cousin – Yooa – and another lady who was with her, the lady looked familiar and as he skated closer to them he immediately recognized her as the girl Yooa was currently seeing, well sort of nothing was official yet but it was obvious to tell they were in love.

Yooa could tell something has been bugging her cousin lately and she could tell that it wasn’t just something he could shrug off so she came to surprise him, Soojin had come to know Seungho quite well and from what she heard from Yooa she was a little worried about Seungho.

The three sat on the bench for a little while. Seungho didn’t know what to talk about and Yooa wasn’t sure how to confront him without hurting him but they both knew they had to get it off their chests.

“Is it your mom?” Yooa asked out of nowhere surprising Seungho a little, although he would love to hide it Yooa knew him she knew all his weaknesses and she knew when he was lying and he knew she wouldn’t be having any of it.

“Somewhat? Chan and I have to create our program, but he doesn’t know what happened back then, he doesn’t know the whole reason why I stopped skating, he doesn’t know what happened to me back then… and I can’t get myself to open up either” he explained.

Yooa looked at him with slight anger, she understood where Seungho was coming from sure the topic on why he stopped was hard to talk about but Chan has always been straight forward with Seungho and he constantly helped Seungho with everything but now Seungho couldn’t even be straightforward with Chan about something that could cost all the hard work and progress he has made.

“Okay… Well, I am done, just cancel everything then” Yooa said in a monotone voice, she wanted to comfort Seungho sure but she has been baby-ing him for too long and she knows that and she knew if she wasn’t going to be hard on him now he will regret not being honest with Chan.

Seungho looked at her a little surprised.

“I mean, the pair skate it the main attraction is it not? Both you and his fans absolutely love your chemistry and friendship and whatever else is going on between the two of you, he supports you through everything, I mean if it wasn’t for him you wouldn’t even be here right now so what’s the point of even continuing anything if you can’t even tell him what is going on with you? You will never actually move forward unless you face it all so just let it all go and be honest with him and if you can’t at least don’t waste his time by letting him come to practice sessions you don’t have your heart in”

Seungho could tell Yooa just about had enough of his self-pity and he got where she was coming from, he thought about everything Chan had done for him so far and just how hard Chan had pushed him so he could get here and he felt grateful for Chan and he felt the one thing he owed Chan the most was an explanation as to what happened all those years ago.

Yooa and Soojin left shortly after Yooa’s outburst, Soojin thought it would be better to leave before Yooa said something she might regret and it would hurt her and Seungho’s relationship.

Seungho sat in the same spot with a lot of thoughts running through his head, Yooa’s words kept repeating itself and one thing that caught his attention the most was that Yooa pointed out that there was something between him and Chan and although he had picked up on something going on between them he wasn’t sure if he was just being delusional and reading everything wrong.

But Yooa’s words made sense to him, in the end, he came to a conclusion… he needed to be open with Chan. The true reason why he never went back to skating wasn’t just because of his injury or about his controlling mother it was a little more than that.

And as his mind was running with everything a simple tap on his shoulder snapped him out of everything, he looked up and his eyes met Chan’s. The older boy looked worried and it made Seungho feel bad for not only worrying his own cousin but also someone who is so important to him.

“I thought you had a schedule today?” Seungho asked.

“We finished early so I asked hyung to drop me off here so we can work on our program,” Chan explained and Seungho tensed up a little.

“Hey, Chan can we talk about something?” Seungho asked, catching Chan a little off guard.

“Sure, what about?”

“The reason I left skating”

“You already told me, it was because of your injury and not enjoying it anymore,” Chan said and the younger boy shook his head a little.

“The real reason Chris” Seungho caused Chan to look at him a little confused, Seungho patted the spot next to him and the older boy sat down, waiting for the younger to speak.

“You see… there is more to my injury, the reason I got injured was that it was intentional, I use to love skating when I first started, my mom got involved when I got more into it and eventually, she took over, I had to do everything her way and even my dad hated it, it strained their marriage and the damage was too much to take for him, I overheard one of their fights it was just before the competition and my dad asked for a divorce and know I was the reason behind that” Seungho said with a sigh.

“Knowing I was the main reason for the damage to their marriage if I never got into skating none of this would’ve happened you know? So on the day of practice, I tried to do a jump that wasn’t in my program, a jump I couldn’t land and I got injured, it was on purpose hyung… I needed to stop skating so I could save their marriage but in the end not even that could save it, with my injury and me not being allowed to skate my mom wanted nothing to do with me so after the divorce I went to live with my dad… it was hard to deal with everything, I was scared if I ever returned to the ice I would hurt more people like that and I don’t want that”

Seungho didn’t want to look at Chan. He wasn’t sure how he just let everything out. It was too much for him to keep in but letting it out that easily… he never knew it was possible.

He felt Chan’s intense stare on him and when he looked at the older he saw some tears running down from the older eyes, he panicked a little he immediately hugged him and Chan happily returned it.

“It must’ve been hard on you, I don’t blame you for leaving but injuring yourself on purpose must’ve sucked so much especially when I see you loving the ice too much I can only imagine the pain you keep inside,” Chan said and hugged the boy a little tighter before pulling back a little.

He scanned across Seungho’s face a little, his eyes lingering on the younger’s lips, he looked back up to his eyes to see if there was any rejection but there was nothing, he found himself leaning forward and before they knew it the little gap closed.

Their eyes closed almost automatically and it felt like fireworks were going off inside them… that feeling was amazing to both of them, it felt like everything was okay if they were together and it felt like a warm blanket in the middle of a freezing winter.

They felt the empty hole in their hearts fill up and when they broke the kiss they couldn’t look at each other without giggling a little.

“Sorry, here you are being straightforward with me and all I can think is how much I want to kiss you and how much I want to hug you and comfort you,” Chan said, slapping himself a little.

“It’s okay… you helped clear my mind a lot,” Seungho said happily.

The two sat there for a while letting what happened fully establish itself in their minds before they got up and for once when they went on the ice to plan their program it went well actually it went better, they were in sync and it seemed like they have been planning and practicing for months when in reality they haven’t.

Mr.Kim stood in his office and watched the two out of his window with a small smile, he couldn’t help but feel happy seeing them happy, he may not know a lot about Seungho but he is a father and he can tell if something is up with someone and he quickly figured there was more to Seungho than he knew and he just wanted to see the boy happy it was all that mattered to him.