Comfort was something I rarely ever felt. I always felt out of place, like I didn’t belong.
Lying down on Fox’s bed, his arms wrapped around me, his fingers playing with the hem of my shirt and brushing against the skin just above the waist of my pants, was comfortable. In his arms, with my head resting on his chest, was a place I belonged.
I never had this with anyone else, feeling so close that I could lay with them in silence and be entirely content. With Fox, everything was different. Everything made sense.
It was just about seven PM when Fox and I decided to head over to Ryan’s. His party wasn’t set to kick off for another hour, but he insisted the guys get there early.
When we got downstairs, we were greeted by Fox’s parents in the living room.
“So we’ve been talking,” Leo started, glancing at each of us.
Fox sighed, giving his father an impatient look.
“Don’t give me attitude,” Leo chastised, though he didn’t sound all that serious.
“We were just thinking,” Vanessa interjected. “Since you guys are dating, maybe we shouldn’t be letting you upstairs with the door closed.”
My face flushed while Fox scoffed.
“I think it’s a little late for that,” Fox said, glancing at his parents with raised eyebrows.
“Fox,” I said through gritted teeth, smacking him on the shoulder with the back of my hand.
“He’s kinda right,” Leo said in a light tone, shrugging as he looked to his wife.
Vanessa gave him a stern look, her hands on her hips as she shook her head at him.
“That’s what responsible parents do,” Vanessa said.
“We’re not responsible parents,” Leo pointed out.
“We’re leaving,” Fox announced, grabbing onto my hand and leading me out of the house.
I said goodbye to his parents before he pulled me out of the house.
“They’re going to be insufferable,” Fox complained, walking with me to my car.
I chuckled. “Maybe.”
“Are you taking your car?” Fox asked as he noticed me unlocking it.
“I have to go pick Josh up,” I told him, opening the door.
“How about you drop the car off for him and then ride with me,” he suggested with a grin.
“I guess I could do that,” I replied, my expression matching his.
Fox followed closely behind me all the way to my house and I crookedly parked in the driveway once we got there. Dad was in the middle of taking out the trash when the two of us pulled up, waving us over.
“Are you guys heading out?” Dad asked when we each stepped out of our cars.
“Yeah I was just dropping the car off for Josh,” I told him, glancing over at Fox who appeared to have an uneasy expression on his face.
“Wanna come in for a couple minutes? I’m sure Mindy would love to see you Fox,” Dad said, a wide smile directed at my boyfriend.
Fox pressed his lips together. “Sure.”
I gave him a quizzical look before we began following my dad up the driveway and into the house. Fox placed a hand on my hip, slowing me down so he could speak in my ear.
“Should we tell them?” Fox whispered, sounding slightly panicked.
“Chill. Why are you so worried about them knowing?” I whispered back.
“I don’t want them to think I’m not good enough for you.”
He looked like he hated to admit it, but it was truly a fear of his.
I shook my head, trying to reassure him as we met up with Dad, Mindy, and Josh in the kitchen. Ava must’ve already had her friends over considering the amount of giggling coming from the living room.
“Fox! It’s good to see you!” Mindy exclaimed, standing to give him a hug.
“You too,” he said, returning the favor.
“Aw, did you guys come to pick me up?” Josh teased as Mindy released Fox. “How sweet.”
“Absolutely not,” Fox retorted, causing me to laugh at Josh’s faux offended face.
“I wouldn’t wanna be in a car with you two anyway,” Josh replied, waving him off. “I’d be hardcore third wheeling.”
“What do you mean?” Dad asked, tilting his head to the side with a confused expression.
Josh’s eyes widened, along with Fox’s, while Mindy and Dad looked around at each of us as if waiting for an explanation.
“Um,” I started, clearing my throat. “Josh would be third wheeling because Fox and I are dating.”
“I knew it!” Mindy shouted, jumping up from her seat and pointing at us, barely giving time for the words to finish leaving my mouth.
I shouldn’t have even been surprised. Mindy knew everything. However, that didn’t stop the air from leaving my lungs and the startled noise from escaping my throat as I thought of Mindy speculating about Fox and me.
Fox still looked worried, his teeth trapping his bottom lip between them.
“You’re what?” Dad asked incredulously, his eyes widening as he looked between us and Mindy.
“They’re dating, Dan,” Josh clarified in an even tone.
“Since when?” he asked, looking at me and then darting his eyes to Mindy. “And how did you know about it?”
“Since a couple hours ago,” Fox answered, scratching the back of his neck. He looked like he was more uncomfortable telling my parents about us dating than he was coming out to his own.
“I just had a feeling,” Mindy replied with a sly smile, glancing at the two of us. “Call it mother’s intuition.”
Dad distantly stared toward the wall, looking as if his mind was processing this new information. A forced smile stretched onto his face after a few moments, turning his gaze to Fox and me.
“I’m really happy for you guys,” he said, patting Fox on the shoulder before leaving the room.
The four of us left in the kitchen stood in an awkward silence until Fox spoke up.
“He hates me,” Fox blurted.
“He doesn’t hate you,” Mindy, Josh, and I said in unison.
“He’s just processing the fact that his son has a boyfriend,” Mindy assured him. “It’s nothing against you. He loves you.”
Fox just nodded, though he didn’t look entirely convinced or consoled by Mindy’s words. I knew her words were true. Dad was insanely protective of me and he wasn’t expecting me to get into a relationship.
When the two of us left the house and got into Fox’s car, he was still quiet.
“You don’t seriously think my dad hates you, right?” I asked Fox, reaching over to rest my hand over his which was gripping the gear shift.
“He looked like we just caused him to have a midlife crisis,” Fox retorted in a deadpanned tone.
“No, he didn’t,” I said, fighting the urge to roll my eyes at him. “He’s freaked out about me having a boyfriend because he’s always worried about me.”
Fox kept a pout on his face as he let out a shallow sigh.
I gripped his hand tighter. “I promise he doesn’t hate you.”
Fox nodded and we moved on from the subject for the rest of the ride to Ryan’s house. Familiar cars lined up in the driveway as most of the other guys were already there. Fox and I made our way into the house, not bothering to knock, knowing Ryan’s parents weren’t home. The two of us descended the steps into the basement where the rest of our friends were.
“There are our favorite lovebirds!” Alex greeted as Fox and I made our way into Ryan’s basement, earning chuckles from the rest of the guys.
Fox led me over to the couch, glaring at Alex as we sat down and throwing his arm around my shoulder.
“So, Elijah,” Ryan started, turning toward me. “I had already invited Trevor and them to the party before knowing you were with Fox. Is that gonna be weird for you?”
I instantly shook my head. “No, it’s fine,” I assured him. “We’re friends.”
I hadn’t even thought about Trevor and the rest of GSA, and the fact that none of them knew I was with Fox. This was all so new and I didn’t know how any of them would react. It was possible that Trevor still had a crush on me and I really couldn’t bear hurting his feelings any more than when I had rejected him.
I was so lost in my thoughts I hadn’t even noticed Josh had arrived a few minutes after we did. He sat on the other side of the room with Ian while Fox and Alex bickered beside me and the others watched whatever Ryan had playing on the TV.
Ryan seemed to have already set everything up for the party, so now we all just waited for people to arrive. No one wanted to be the first, before the party had even kicked off, so it would probably be quite some time until everything was in full swing.
Within a couple hours, basically our entire class was at Ryan’s house, and even some underclassmen as well.
While Fox was playing beer pong with Ryan, Jude, and Ian, I decided to get a drink and see if I could find the GSA group. They weren’t that hard to find once I got upstairs. Lexa, Nadia, Claudia, and Holly were all dancing around together while the guys were standing on the other side of the room, talking to some of their other friends.
Trevor spotted me as soon as I reappeared in the living room after grabbing myself a beer. He excitedly waved me over to him.
“Hey!” Trevor greeted once I reached him, pulling me into a quick hug. “I’m sorry about the tournament.”
“Thanks, Trev,” I said, releasing him from the hug and taking a sip of my beer.
I waited a moment to see if any of them brought up Fox. It was possible that since word got out about the fight at the tournament, that word had also gotten out about Fox and me, but they said nothing.
“I was looking at some of the hockey guys,” Austin started, grinning over the rim of a beer can. “And you guys look pretty hot with all those bruises.”
Johnny smacked him on the back of the head. “Sorry,” Johnny said, glancing toward me. “That’s the only thing he ever thinks about.”
“Trust me, I know,” I replied.
“Did you have a good time besides the whole getting disqualified thing?” Trevor asked with a kind smile, his tone upbeat and hopeful.
I thought back on everything else that happened the last few days. Despite all the bad things that happened, there was one good thing. And he just happened to show up before I could respond.
“I was wondering where you went,” Fox said, coming up behind me and standing close.
“I was bored of watching you lose at beer pong,” I joked, causing Fox to place his hand on his chest as if I had wounded him.
“Obviously, you didn’t watch long enough because Ian and I ended up winning,” he boasted with a triumphant smile.
“I could go for schooling someone in beer pong right now,” Austin said, taking a sip out of his can.
“Alex was looking for someone to lose to,” Fox told him. “You should go play him.”
Fox’s eyes traveled to the beer can in my hand and then back up to my eyes.
“You’re drinking tonight?” he asked me, his eyebrows raised as he pointed toward the can.
“You’re not?” I countered.
He shook his head. “Ian drank for me in pong. Someone needs to drive us home later.”
“You guys came together?” Trevor wondered, his tone light.
“Uh… yeah,” I stuttered, looking to Fox for help, but he kept his expression blank as he wordlessly nodded at Trevor.
Austin finished off the rest of his beer, letting out a content sigh.
“You guys coming down to watch me beat Alex at beer pong?” Austin asked as he started making his way to the basement stairs, Trevor and Johnny following behind him.
“We’ll come down in a little bit,” I said, watching as they left us.
As soon as they were down the stairs and out of sight, Fox turned to me with an irritated expression.
“You don’t want Trevor knowing about us?” he asked in a sharp tone.
“What?” I hissed.
“You obviously didn’t tell him,” Fox retorted, crossing his arms over his chest. “He acted all confused as to why we would be leaving together.”
I scoffed, shaking my head at him. “You’re being ridiculous.”
“No, I’m not.”
“I didn’t know if you were okay with me telling everyone,” I tried reasoning. “So I didn’t say anything.”
Fox huffed, keeping his eyes away from me as he kept a scowl on his face. He was irritated, but he knew he was overreacting.
“I’m sorry,” Fox mumbled, still looking away from me as he rubbed his forehead with the back of his hand. “I guess I’m still jealous when it comes to him.”
“You don’t need to be,” I assured him with a smile, wrapping my arm around his shoulder and discreetly kissing the side of his head.
Fox grinned and the two of us made our way back to the basement with the rest of the guys.
***
By ten minutes to midnight, I was drunk. However, I was in a considerably better mood than the last time I was drunk since then I was using liquor to forget and now I was just having some beers to have fun with my friends.
I was curled up against Fox’s side as we watched the New Year’s eve special on TV. Alex was passed out, lying down across the beer pong table after losing too many games. The GSA kids had gone back upstairs for the girls, so it was mostly just the hockey team and some others who were still in the basement.
“Are you guys staying over tonight?” Ryan asked, walking over to us. “I’m just trying to figure out where I can put everybody. I really don’t want to leave Alex on the table.”
I laughed, which I was doing a lot of in this state.
“We’re going back to my place,” Fox answered for us, tightening his arm around me. “I can take Josh and Ian home if they wanna go.”
Josh looked like he was completely out of it. I hadn’t seen much of him all night, but just by the distant, glossy look in his eyes I could tell he had quite a lot to drink.
As the minutes went by, more and more people started watching the TV for the countdown to midnight.
“Are you going to kiss me at midnight, Foxy?” I asked, nuzzling my face in his neck.
Ian burst out laughing from the other side of the couch.
“Foxy,” he laughed, his smile wider than I had ever seen it.
“Shut up,” Fox snapped at him before turning to me with a soft smile, “Of course I am.”
I sat up when the countdown started and people began to yell it out loud. Fox sat up next to me, his arm around my shoulder while mine was around his waist.
“3… 2… 1… Happy New Year!”
At the words, Fox had his lips on mine. There was so much noise around us, making it hard to even think. My mind was swimming from the alcohol, so I knew my kiss was sloppy, but Fox didn’t seem to mind. His hand was under my chin, propping my face up ever so slightly as he kissed me.
We broke apart, Fox smiling at me and kissing my forehead before I returned to my earlier position, snuggled into his side. The party started winding down after midnight. People started going back upstairs, others had passed out on the floor. It had gotten to the point where the only ones awake were Fox, Josh, Ian, Ryan, Jude, and me. We sat around on the couches as the party dwindled.
Josh looked down at his lap and I could tell something was off with him, even in my intoxication.
“What’s up Joshua?” I slurred, closing my eyes for a few seconds before reopening them.
“Hm?”
“Yeah you seem kinda down bro,” Ryan pointed out, leaning back in his seat. “You drink too much?”
Josh shook his head then thought for a moment.
“Well, maybe a little,” he admitted.
“I can bring you home if you want,” Fox offered.
Josh shook his head again.
“I just— I–” he stopped himself.
“Joshuaaaa,” I dragged out. “What’s goin’ on?”
“I saw Trevor tonight,” he started with a sigh, looking toward me. “And I wanted to apologize to him and I just couldn’t. I’m too much of a coward.”
“What do you need to apologize to him for?” Jude asked, a confused expression on his face.
“You remember that party we went to freshman year? The one the seniors threw?” Josh asked, causing the others to nod.
I was too drunk to tell him to stop. He was drunk, admitting something he would never admit if he was sober.
“Oh yeah,” Ian laughed. “I remember that.”
“I kissed Trevor that night,” Josh confessed in a rushed tone. “We were alone and we were talking and I kissed him.”
Everyone was silent. Fox slowly turned his head toward me, but I kept my eyes on Josh.
“And after I treated him so badly,” Josh said with a shaky voice. “And I feel so bad and I just want to apologize.”
“You can still apologize, Josh,” Ryan consoled him in an even tone. “Trevor’s a really good guy. He will forgive you.”
Josh didn’t say anything and we were stuck in another silence before Ian started laughing again, causing the rest of us to join him.
I didn’t remember falling asleep, but I remembered how comfortable I felt against Fox.
***
Waking in the middle of the night, I had no idea where I was until I looked around and saw Fox sleeping beside me. I couldn’t figure out how he had gotten me to his house without waking me.
My mind was still dizzy and my throat was dry. I stumbled a bit as I stood up from the bed, looking back to make sure I didn’t wake Fox.
I tiptoed out of his bedroom and down the stairs to the kitchen. My heart nearly popped out of my chest when I realized I wasn’t alone in the kitchen.
“Fuck,” I cursed, placing my hand over my chest. “You scared me.”
Wren wordlessly stared at me from where he sat at the kitchen table, a glass of water in front of him.
“What are you doing up?” I asked as I got my own glass of water and stood against the fridge.
“I can’t sleep,” he said in a low tone. His eyes looked a little glazed, telling me he had probably been drinking.
I nodded, sipping on my water.
“Fox didn’t drive drunk, did he?” Wren asked, looking down at his glass.
I shook my head. “He didn’t drink.”
Wren just nodded, taking a long gulp of water.
“Have you fessed up to your parents yet?” I asked. I was still feeling the alcohol a bit, so any filter I had wasn’t as strong as usual.
Wren let out a humorless laugh. “No.”
“Well, you got what you wanted,” I pointed out. “Fox did it first and it turned out fine.”
“Yeah and he hates me even more now,” Wren snapped in a rare moment where he showed anything other than confidence.
“You can still apologize,” I suggested with a shrug.
Wren scoffed. “I don’t apologize.”
“Then that’s your problem,” I replied. “If you ever want to actually make up with him, then come talk to me.”
“You would help me?” he asked, sending a wary glance my way.
“Sure,” I said. “But it would be for him, not for you.”
I finished off my water and left the kitchen before Wren could say anything else.
I tripped on something entering the bedroom, causing Fox to open his eyes.
“Where did you go?” he asked in a raspy voice, rubbing his eyes.
I climbed into bed next to him, intertwining my legs with his and throwing my arm around his waist.
“Just got a drink,” I said. “Go back to sleep, Foxy.” I planted a kiss on his cheek before lying my head down on the pillow.
“Don’t call me that in front of the guys,” Fox mumbled, trailing off toward the end as he close his eyes and started dozing off.
I chuckled quietly before sleep took over me in my place of comfort.
**
Thanks for reading! Sorry this is a little later than usual. I was working all day and had to finish up the chapter when I got home.
Also, I’m not sure how many chapters are going to be left but I wanted to let people know we’re getting close to the end. I know how I want it to end and I’m trying to figure out exactly how to get there. When I have a definite number of chapters left I’ll let you know.
Anyway, what did you think of the chapter? What about Dan and Mindy’s reactions to Fox and Elijah dating? And the New Year’s eve party? And what about Elijah’s conversation with Wren?
Comment