JENNIE
It’s been two months since Lisa and I became okay. We’ve been more intimate than before. Chaeng and Jisoo told me that I’ve changed so much. It was like the ice in me had melted and it was all because of Lisa.
If there’s one thing that I have learned from our fight, that would be the essence of allowing someone to explain or tell their side of the story. We shouldn’t really jump into conclusion because the outcome would be worse than diving into an ocean filled with sharks. We should learn how to listen before we act. We should learn how to understand before we conclude.
School has been giving us headaches. Being a senior student will never be easy. There’s just too much school works on our plates and we can’t even find time to relax. Not to mention that we will be taking our midterms the week after next week. During these days, we barely catch up with each other. Sometimes we only had the chance to talk during lunch time and if we are lucky, we can hang out for an hour after school.
“How is our baby doing at school?” Dad asked. We are currently having our first dinner together since they’ve been to New Zealand for three months and they got back just today. We aren’t originally from here. We are from New Zealand. The reason why I studied here was because mom and dad had to live here for how many years due to the reason that the main branch of our business here needed utmost supervision. And because I don’t want to be left alone, I decided to study here instead.
“I’m doing fine. Our professors are really generous when it comes to giving projects. They might turn the students in the whole department into zombies any moment.”
Mom and dad laughed at my fluent sarcasm.
“That sounds pretty tough. How about your extracurriculars? Are they as hectic as your academics? I’m just worried because you look tired honey. You should find time to relax too,” mom said in her worried voice.
“I’m good mom. I’ve already found a sponsor for this year’s project. They said that they will be willing to grant top ranking students with voucher subsidy to lessen their financial obligations at school.”
“We really raised our daughter well. How many months will it be until graduation?”
“7 months. You better start preparing a loud party for me.”
“We’ll do honey,” mom said with an assuring smile.
“Oh, I almost forgot. We will be going back to New Zealand a day after your graduation. Your grandma needs a family who will take good care of her. You know that she’s been diagnosed with alzheimer’s disease lately, right?”
My mind stopped working for a moment. What did dad said? We’re going back to New Zealand? After my graduation?
How about me? How about Lisa? I can’t leave her. I don’t want to leave her. I don’t know what life can be when I’m far away from my happiness.
But then, grandma needs us. I can’t simply neglect her for my own selfish needs. She’s ill and she needs a family to be by her side.
“Jennie?”
I heaved a deep sigh before I responded.
“C-can’t I stay here?” I asked hesitantly. I saw how my dad’s forehead creased. He’s not happy with my response.
“That won’t do honey. From the start you are well aware that earning a degree is just a pre-requisite to boost your background. After you graduate, you’ll start learning how our company works. You are our only child. Who will take over our company if it’s not you?”
“But dad—”
“Jennie. Your dad needs to rest too. His health has been declining lately. He needs to relax. He is getting old, I am too. We are not getting any younger. This is for your own good too honey. So please, do understand us okay?”
They are leaving me with no choice at all. Do they even care about my well-being? How about my happiness? How about me? Is this even my life? How am I supposed to claim that this is my life if I’m no different from a robot who does everything that she’s been told to do?
Will this be my fate? What will happen to us? Can we still work things out even if we’re far away from each other? I can’t picture Lisa’s reaction when I tell her about this. I promised not to keep anything from her. After all, concealing this will be impossible because at the end, I will still be leaving this country for good.
“O-okay.”
I agreed, feeling defeated. Family comes first. That’s how it goes for me even if it means self-deprivation.
7 months. I still have 7 months left. I must spend it wisely. Every day must be as precious as gold.
After the dinner, I went to my room and wore my hoodie. I went to my car and drove towards Lisa’s place.
To Poopoo:
Come out. I’m here.
After five minutes, I saw Lisa running towards the gate. When she went out, I immediately hugged her.
I really can’t leave her. Not when she’s the reason why I changed so much. Not when she’s keeping a good grip of my heart.
“Hey. Are you okay? You’re hugging me way too tight,” Lisa said while gently tapping my back.
“I’m… I’m sorry!” I responded as I pull myself away from her. Her smiling face was immediately covered with worry. Her eyes was questioning me.
“Jen, why are you crying?” Lisa took a step closer to wipe my tears. I didn’t even realize that I was already crying.
“I need to tell you something.”
“What is it? I’m all ears. Hush now okay?” With a warm smile, Lisa leveled her face to me. It was the most comforting view I’ve ever seen—her smile. It’s everything.
“I…after..I will—”
“Relax Jen, I’m here. There’s nothing to worry about.”
“After graduation, I’ll be leaving this country…for good. Dad… it’s his decision. And there’s no way that I…that I can convince him to make me stay here,” I paused. Lisa was just staring at me as if she was examining my face.
“I’m scared Lisa. I can’t imagine myself without you. You spoiled me with your love, with your presence, with your hugs, with your kisses, and now… I’m depending too much on you. I’ve never felt this happy and no one can ever make me feel like this except you,” Lisa chortled and pulled me in a hug.
“Shhh. You’re so silly. Is this why you’re crying? You were afraid to leave me? Where are you going? New York? Russia? Japan? Las Vegas?”
“New Zealand.”
“Ohh New Zealand. I can still visit you from time to time, so stop crying. I would go wherever you are just to see you okay? As long as it is not North Korea,” she laughed softly and it somehow made me chuckle too.
Lisa is really great at comforting me. She’s right. We can just visit each other when we have time. It’s not as if I’m going to Pluto or Mars or Jupiter.
I’m so goofy. I came all the way here crying like a kid who got lost in wonderland. I didn’t even think that we can still see each other even if we’re afar.
“And we still have 7 months Jen. Let’s make much of that time. Let’s be happy, let’s go crazy, let’s explore and wander—it’s synonymous don’t mind that. Anyway, what I’m trying to say is, we still got plenty of time to spend with each other. Let’s think of it that way,”
“But 7 months is too short,” I complained as I hugged her tighter.
“Then we will make it the longest 7 months of our lives.”
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