For the nth time that night, Sandra closed her book. She hadn’t finished the courses she needed to study yet, and it was already after midnight. Cate, her girlfriend, had made a meal before she left for a taping, and it was still sitting on the study table, undisturbed. The brunette shifted her gaze from the table to her phone. She had seven messages from her girlfriend, most likely wondering whether she was okay, but she switched the phone off rather than opening and composing her response. Her intellect, like she, was a jumble. Her energy was depleted, and all she wanted to do was lie in bed with her lover, but Cate was unavailable due to a crucial tape so she had no choice, but to suck up her wants.
Sandra angrily put her pen down for goddamn it, her eyes yearned to rest. She’d had enough for the day. She needed to sleep, so she headed up to her bed, but just as she was about to jump in, she heard a huge clunk against her glass window. She gently proceeded towards the location, opening the curtain to see what it was, but what she saw instead were the starry skies flashing with such warmth. As she opened her window, her lips twisted into a smile. The night was breathtakingly lovely. The moon shone brightly and the stars twinkled. For a little period, she dreamt of going out. What a wonderful thing it would be to sit outdoors by the lamppost and stare at the twinkling celestials with someone you love immensely. With a shake of her head, Sandra expressed her dissatisfaction with the situation. Cate was out and about on her own.
“Are you really going to pretend you didn’t see me at all?”
The brunette looked down and was shocked when she saw her girlfriend, sitting on the hood of her car with two paperbags of McDonald’s beside her. The stars of the night were not as gleam and bright as the twinkle of their eyes looking at each other. Sandra did waste no time as she ran out of the room, down to the stairs and out of the main door where she ran, barefooted before she crashed her body towards the blonde.
“Why –” Sandra grinned as she looked at her girlfriend in bewilderment, “You are supposed to be working! What are you doing here?”
Cate smiled as she tucked some loose hair behind the brunette’s ear, “Well, my girl needs me. She needs to breathe and while I was stuck in my trailer, I keep tossing on bed.” Cate got off the hood of the car as she held Sandra’s waist, “I keep thinking of you.” She added sweetly, her voice velvety and soft that it painted cranberry tint on Sandra’s cheeks, “And I am missing you. Badly.”
Sandra left out a giggle before she cupped Cate’s cheeks, with her hands, “You’re out for only 6 hours.” She stated.
“And so what?” Cate pushed her lightly, held her hand before she made the brunette twirl, “I am missing you.”
“Why do I feel like you just want to fuck me?” Sandra joked as she twirled once more before she came to a halt as Cate held her waist to stop.
“A ten percent probability.” The blonde answered before she leaned down and made their noses touched, “Do you know what I really want to do with you right now?”
“What?” Sandra whispered.
“Dance with you under the stars.”
And on that starry night, they did.
Sandra shook the memories as she drove away from the hospital. It was ten in the evening and for that whole day, her ex-girlfriend had been running around her mind. As she drove down the streets, she saw lovers holding hands while some were making out on the dark alleys, some were giggling as they passed with grocery bags on hand, some were obviously fighting, and all that, she and Cate did. Would Cate be happy if she knew that she bought a dog? Cate always wanted to have a dog, but some for reason, Sandra never said yes because she felt that she couldn’t meet up with the responsibility of raising one, but when they broke up, the brunette just found herself on a pet store. She bought a polaroid camera too, and on the same wall where Cate used to fuck her senseless, she pasted photographs.
The brunette was well-aware that her heart was a baited hook and Cate was her prey, but she was also cognizant that Cate’s heart was a chainsaw and she was the wood. Before any more casualties could be printed, they cut each other off. No blood, but there were bruises and unhealed wounds in their hearts and there had also been almost a hundred nights of crying. Sandra turned her radio off as she went inside the suburbs where her home was. She noticed how starry the night was, and for a moment, she recounted those times when she and Cate stargazed, when they danced and those moments when they kissed. As she approached her home, she realized that she and Cate used to live in a fairytale, yet she chose to be the villain. But in those deep blue eyes and red creamy lips, she still felt weak.
The brunette pulled over, but was shocked when she noticed that a car was parked just outside her house. She went out of the car in haste, but when she stepped into the ground, it was when Cate got out of the car. Black well-pressed suit on, red heels and red lips as she smiled at her very stunned doctor in front of her.
“Hi.” Cate offered to break the staring game as she handed Sandra a bouquet of her favorite flowers, peony, “How was work?”
“I don’t need flowers.” Was it a lie? Probably.
Cate nodded shyly as she pulled her hand down, “Okay.” She answered slyly before she looked up at her again, “What do you need?”
Sandra gave her a cold look, “None of your business.”
If it was game, Cate could really play, “But you’re my business.” The blonde answered smugly; if her ex was playing hard to get, she could play the annoying ex too.
“You know what?” Sandra exclaimed, “Fuck off and go home.”
“Come on.” Cate blocked her way as she offered her the bouquet again, “Flowers?”
“I told you I don’t need that.”
“Then what do you need?”
“I need a good motherfucking rest and I need my ex-girlfriend, who happens to be you, to stop bothering me.” Sandra replied, her voice evident with annoyance as she looked at her, “Stop going into my work. Stop coming here. I need peace.” And with that, Sandra started walking away towards her front door, eager to leave her ex-girlfriend outside.
“Wouldn’t it be fair for you to ask me what I need too?” Cate shouted, the bouquet of peonies falling down at her feet.
Sandra, only an inch away from her door turned around, exasperated, “What the fuck do you fucking want?”
“I want to dance with you under the stars.” A pause, “Again.”
The sky was moonless, but the stars were bright. And Sandra’s heart was once again crumbling down like meteors in a speedway chasing. Cate’s want was a plea and Sandra knew that underneath her strong skin were her grieving bones begging to rest. Cate stood, waited for an answer before Sandra noticed that there were tears streaming down cheeks, and she stood outside her door, unfeeling.
***
Comment