INSPIRED BY THE SONG ABOVE AT THE END OF THE CHAPTER
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You and Evan pass the time talking about video games, his school, and his favorite show that’s inspired by the diner. Evan doesn’t seem too big on video games surprisingly, you thought kids loved them but he seems to prefer school and playing with friends. What really gets your attention is when you first heard about the show, you are beyond impressed by it. This diner must be more important to the town than you originally thought. What would happen if the news about the disappearances came to light? Even though you were trying to distract yourself, the disappearances keep coming back to your mind…
You think Evan realized you weren’t listening anymore and stopped talking, you snap back to reality. Sorry little buddy. Before you could say anything, you see Michael sit down next to Evan. You try to brush it off, his friends seem to have left so he probably had nothing to do now. You kind of want to get to know him, you don’t know why. Maybe it’s because he’s one of William’s kid and well, you’ll admit it, you like William. Getting to know his kids just seems to come naturally.
“Hey Michael, right?” You say, trying to start a conversation with the teenager.
Michael doesn’t respond, clearly not interested in conversation with you but you persist either way.
“I’m new to town and I’d love to make new friends!-” you continue, trying again in an attempt to start something.
“Why would you move here…?” Michael suddenly says, interrupting you as he messes with the numerous bandages littering his arms and hands.
“…uh, I had no where else to go.” You answer quietly as you bit your lip anxiously.
“Why didn’t you live with family or friends anywhere else? This place is shit, you made a bad call.” Michael bluntly mutters, still not looking in your direction.
“Well, I… I actually left my family and friends, if I can still call them that…” You mumble, looking away in an ashamed manner. It’s silent as both boys stare at you, you probably should have kept your mouth shut. You fear judgment or questions but nothing happens, they just stare at you…
“What happened?” Oh, there’s the question you dreaded, it’s Evan asking, “Ow! Mike!” Evan whimpers out as Michael punches his shoulder.
“Hey! Calm down…” You say, rubbing Evan’s shoulder where Michael punched him to soothe him.
Michael sits back, pondering something, “You don’t have to answer his question.” He says, glaring at Evan slightly.
“I mean, I was expecting it… But it’s a little, well a lot, personal.” You mumble in almost a whisper as shame fills you to the brim.
“You really don’t need to answer…” Evan says, hugging you gently, you can’t help the smile that crawls onto your face sweetly.
You think about it, you’re not really confident in how to say it and you don’t know if they’ll judge you. Kids can be either the sweetest accepting little ones or judgemental monsters. You like kids as much as you can but some of them are fucking gremlins… But fuck, you really want to get it out. You could tell Damien/Daryl or William but you don’t want to unload on Damien/Daryl and don’t want to talk to William at the moment. You’re still embarrassed and you would not be able to talk to him seriously.
“Look what you did…” Michael mutters to Evan who just looks away sadly.
“Ah! Sorry, no no. Nothing is wrong, um I’m just thinking if I wanna say it…” You murmur quietly, fidgeting with your fingers.
They both wait patiently, Evan giving you a sweet smile as he waits. You smile back and pat his head gently as you awkwardly look away.
“So, my family is very unaccepting to various things and well, my sexuality is one of those things…” You awkwardly say whilst pulling at the collar of your shirt.
“Sexuality?” Evan repeats, confused. Fuck, how do you explain it, you just stay quiet and think…
“…you know how I like guys, Evan?” Michael suddenly says, seeming to understand your silence. Thank you, Michael.
“Uh yeah?” Evan responds, tilting his head at his older brother. Not really fazed by that sentence to your surprise, you’re not used to such a chill reaction to a conversation like this.
“It’s kind of like that, your sexuality is the word you use to describe who you like. That’s the best way I can explain it to you…” Michael mutters with a shrug, it’s definitely awkward for him to say but he has more confidence in this than you do…
“Wait, your family and friends don’t like you for who you love, Y/N?” Evan asks a slight shocked expression on his face as his eyes give this look of pity. Geez, he’s so sweet and clueless about the hate in the world, so precious. You wish you could protect that innocence.
You nervously nod, embarrassed that Michael had to answer for you because of you’re inability to explain your own sexuality. You’re really not confident in your sexuality. Wait, Michael’s gay or well, likes guys? You didn’t expect to find anyone…even remotely similar to you. William just confuses you and it’s hard to take anything he says seriously and you still can’t believe that he kissed you…
You don’t know why but they both stayed quiet, maybe they thought you needed a minute. But your thoughts come rushing back and you start to think about everything. You think back to the times you were happiest as a child, they always involved your family and friends. Now you sit here, alone and sinking down in this fucking void like a crater… Stuck here like an idiot. You have no idea what to do with your life anymore, you don’t know if your family will ever accept you.
Wait, you never found out what the cash transfer was about the other day…It was probably an accident but fuck, it’s getting your hopes up. If they had something to say, they would have done so already. So why do you feel like this? You’re lost in a world that you can’t rewind, you were mad to think you were doing anything good by coming out. Now you’ll spend the rest of your life reaching out only to be disappointed when nobody is there. And without anyone there for you, pushing somehow, you can’t move. You’ll be sitting in your car, sitting about the life you left behind, you’re lost and it’s too late. It’s just getting later by the second. Why did you have to be so fucking stupid? Why did you let it all go?
You were fucking mad, fucking crazy, for all the choices you made leading to this point. Now you’ll be taunted by the life you left behind, the life where you felt so alive… The space you leave empty by your choices, the empty air. Life goes on but now you’re… You feel like you were in a black hole like everything good and everything worth living for got sucked away. Every moment you shared with those you loved hanging over you like an unfinished…rhyme? You’re left here to sift through everything for a moment to smile about, for a moment to live for. You can’t rewind after all.
You don’t hear it but someone makes their way over to you, Michael, and Evan. What shifts your attention and gaze is when you hear their voice speak up. “What are you all doing? What’s the long faces for?” You look up and blush slightly when you see William, guess he finally took the suit off… Thankfully because you don’t think you can look at Bonnie the same again.
You can’t help but admire William at the moment, if he is into you genuinely then wow, he’s so confident in his sexuality. He’s been basically flirting with you since day one, at least you think it’s flirting. William will probably confuse you till the end of time but you kind of like it. He gives you something else to worry about instead of your hopeless life and your family. William may make you flustered and he can be scary but overall, you feel like you can be yourself around him. You can’t imagine how it will feel when you’re gone, you really don’t plan on staying here.
When you see William’s face, you can’t help but feel… love struck and kind of get blinded by love. You forget about the world around you, you just want to take this moment to stare at him. But you don’t, you remember he asked something when he came over. You don’t think either of his kids answered because he just raises an eyebrow at the three of you. Embarrassing…
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