Tamar P.O.V.
After my interview, Janet and Toni, well more so Janet, insisted that I stay for dinner. Neither I nor Toni was comfortable with that, but we would have to ease the tension between us sooner or later if I was going to work for them. Janet was in the kitchen while Toni and I sat in the living room on opposite sides of the coffee table, staring at each other in silence. There were a lot of things I wanted to say to her, but now that I was seeing her face for the first time in 10 years, I didn’t know how to say them. Her hatred for me was written all over her gorgeous face. Her eyes were hard to look into because they were so emotionless and bone-chilling. The sound of Janet’s heels clicking on the marble floor broke the silence. She walked in bearing a bottle of champagne and three flutes.
Janet: Would you like a drink, ladies?
Toni: Tamar isn’t thirsty for a drink. She’s only thirsty for our money. She’s thirsty for every fucking thing I own, so no, I don’t think a drink will suffice, but thank you anyway baby.
Tamar: What makes you think I want anything you have? I don’t ask you for shit but your love and support, things I shouldn’t have to ask you for at all!
Toni: You play the victim role so well, you should get an Oscar for your dedication. After everything you’ve put me and our entire family through, you should be on your knees begging for my forgiveness. You’re pretty comfortable on your knees, correct? But instead, you’re sitting in my house trying to make me feel bad for being the real victim.
Tamar: I don’t want to go backwards with you, but you clearly want to have a problem with me. I came here for more than a job. I came hoping we could heal our broken sisterhood, but you just want to cut deeper into the wound. If you still want me to work for you, I’ll just do my job and stay out of your way.
Toni: That works perfectly for me.
Toni stood up, going into the kitchen. I wiped away the tears in my eyes threatening to fall down my cheeks. I could faintly hear Toni arguing with Janet, and their argument was about me. From what I could hear things were getting pretty heated between them. I decided it would be best if I just left, but the sound of Janet’s silky, honey-like voice stopped me in my tracks just as my hand touched the doorknob.
Janet: Wait, please don’t go. Toni didn’t mean any of what she said.
Tamar: Yes she did. She meant every word, but I can take the abuse. I’m used to it.
Janet: I don’t want you to leave like this. Toni’s my wife and I want her to have a relationship with her sister.
Tamar: She doesn’t want a relationship with me so what’s the point? There’s nothing me or you or anyone can do about it.
My voice cracked and the tears that were fighting to escape my eyes finally cascaded down my face. I allowed myself to break down completely as Janet took me into her arms. After being shut out in the cold for so many years, she felt warm. She rubbed my back in soothing circles as I cried into her chest. I felt a presence watching us. I looked up to see Toni staring at us from the threshold, her baby sister in the arms of her wife.
Toni: Why don’t you hold me like that, your fucking wife?! Don’t you think I’m hurting too?!
Janet: It seems like you’re the one doing the hurting. You’re hurting yourself and you’re hurting your sister by icing her out. I love you babe, but right is right and wrong is wrong.
Toni: You don’t know Tamar like I do! This is what she does! She makes you feel sorry for her and she manipulates your emotions until she takes everything away from you!
Tamar: I had everything taken from me!
I broke out of Janet’s arms, furiously wiping my tears and crossing the room to Toni. Janet didn’t step between us, she instead let us air out all of our anger and pain. I was holding in so much damage and baggage from my past that I needed to let go of.
Tamar: You knew what they were doing to me in that fucking house and you left! You left to become a famous singer and while you were touring the world, I was being raped and abused every fucking day by our parents! You never came back for me! You abandoned me when I needed you the most! I became a stripper at 17 to feed myself because you weren’t there!
Toni: It didn’t happen like that and you know it Tamar. You’re not the only one who went through it. I went through it too, but I’m not begging for pitty and placing my shortcomings on others! You’re pathetic! Before you clean anything in this house, you need to clean your dirty ass soul!
Janet: That’s enough Tone!
Tamar: You know what, forget it. I’ll just go. Since I’m so fucking dirty, I’ll just go back to the dirty ass strip club! I’ve been on my own for 10 years, I can survive another 10 on my own!
I gathered my purse and my coat, ready to storm out. Janet stopped me, handing me a tiny slip of paper.
Janet: Here’s my number in case you change your mind. Please don’t make a decision you’ll regret. Your emotions are heightened right now. Just think about it.
Tamar: Thank you Janet. My sister is lucky to have a woman like you.
Toni: Yeah, a woman you can’t have.
I simply rolled my eyes at Toni’s comment, kissing Janet on the cheek as I made my way out of the door.
Janet P.O.V.
After Tamar left, Toni and I had a huge fight. It ended in her throwing a wine bottle just inches from hitting my head and me storming out of the house. After driving around for hours, trying to clear my head before I went back home to Toni, I found myself in the strip club where Tamar worked.
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