Gunwook x Y/N
Bittersweet
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If you could turn time around, would you do the same?
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“Y/N, I asked Yujeong out, and she said yes!” The excited Gunwook told you over the phone. “I wanted you to be the first one to know this.”
“Really? Congratulations.” Pain instantly spread across your chest, but you forced a smile, trying to trick yourself into believing that you were fine.
There was a part of you that wished this day would never come, but you were also 99.9% certain that it would eventually happen, given how well things had gone between Gunwook and Yujeong. Your friendship with Gunwook started as seatmates in your first year of high school. From then on, you two became besties who would tell each other everything. But there was one secret you kept from him: you saw him as more than a friend. You couldn’t tell him because you didn’t want to risk your friendship, even if that meant that you’d have to see him ending up with someone else.
Gunwook met Yujeong in an academy out of school, and her name soon became one of the most frequently mentioned subjects in your conversations. You watched him fall in love with her. You watched as he grew fonder and fonder of her day by day. Every time he talked about her, it tore your heart into pieces, and yet you still gave him sincere advice on how to get her attention and court her.
“You sound so calm. I was expecting a bigger reaction from you.” He whined.
“I knew she would say yes.” You said while wiping away the tear that slipped out the corner of your eye.
“How did you know?”
“Because I’m such a good love coach, and you took all of my advice.”
“Okay, I have to admit that you helped me a lot. I promise I’ll treat you to something to thank you.”
“You better.” You tried so hard to hold back your sniffles, but you could still hear your voice shaking.
“Are you okay? You sound like you caught a cold.”
“Yeah, it’s just hay fever. I have to go now, Gunwook-ah. Let’s talk later.” You were close to breaking down.
“Okay. Talk to you later.”
Tears poured out once you hung up the call.
You thought you could stand seeing him happy with another girl, and you thought you would be content as long as you stayed in his life as his best friend. But you were wrong — awfully wrong.
You found yourself slowly distancing yourself from him. You deliberately applied to a different college, even though you two once dreamed of going to the same college. You suppressed the urge to talk to him even on days when it was really tough and you wished he was there to listen to you and make you smile again. There were no big fights or arguments, but from one point onwards, you two grew apart and stopped talking to each other.
It was ironic how you never told him how you felt because you didn’t want to ruin your friendship, but you ended up losing him as a lover and as a friend.
.
How long has it been? You don’t even remember when the last time you talked to him was, but it’s probably been seven years, more or less.
You never expected to bump into Gunwook on the street like this. He came up to you in a store after recognising you.
“Y/N?”
Your brain malfunctioned for a second when you saw Gunwook standing in front of you. He looked a lot more mature, but his smile was still as radiant as you remembered it to be.
“Gunwook-ah.” It felt a bit weird calling out the name that was once so familiar to you.
After greeting each other briefly, he asked if you had time to spare for a cup of coffee. So here you were, sitting across from Gunwook in a cafe.
“It’s been so long. How have you been?” He asked.
“Pretty good.”
“What are you doing now? I remember you saying you wanted to open a bakery.”
“Haha, I went to do the complete opposite. I’m working as a dietician now. How about you?”
“I’m working as a sales consultant at a consulting firm.”
“Suits you well. Are you still with Yujeong?” You’d be lying if you said you’d never wondered about what happened to Yujeong and Gunwook.
“No, we broke up in year 3 of college.” He said casually.
You just nodded your head and took a sip from your cup of coffee.
“Sometimes I wonder what happened between us back then. It felt like nothing happened, but all of a sudden we stopped contacting each other. When I realised we had drifted apart, I thought of reaching out to you again, but I never did because I was scared it would be awkward.”
His words brought you back to high school. It’s been so long, but you were surprised at how easy it was to recall those emotions. You felt your heart clench, even though your feelings were not the same anymore.
“I liked you a lot, Gunwook-ah.” You never thought you’d have another chance to tell him these words that were once so difficult to say.
“But I couldn’t bring myself to tell you then. And when I realised that I was just being a coward, it was too late; you were already dating Yujeong. It was way too difficult for me to see the two of you together, so I chose to walk away.” You were saying this as if it were nothing, but you knew better than anyone how long it took you to move on.
You looked at Gunwook, who was too stunned to speak, but apparently he wasn’t just shocked.
“Y/N,” he sighed. “I liked you too.”
You froze, unable to process what he just said.
“I wasn’t really into Yujeong in the beginning. I just wanted to end my feelings for you because they were getting uncontrollable and I didn’t want it to complicate our friendship. As time went on, I fell for Yujeong and thought it was for the better, but I didn’t know that would cause you so much pain.”
“So if either one of us had confessed, we could have ended up dating each other?”
“I can’t believe we let each other slip away like that.” He looked at you with eyes filled with regret.
“I guess it’s a different kind of consolation for our old selves to know that we once loved each other at the same time.” Oddly, you felt a sense of release. It was like a heavy rock that had been weighing on your heart all this time was removed.
“And it’s also nice to know that you found someone who’d make you happy.” Gunwook’s gaze went down to the ring on your left ring finger.
You also looked down at your engagement ring, and the mere thought of the man who put the ring on your finger made you smile from ear to ear. “Have you found that someone too?”
He nodded his head with a tender smile. “We don’t have marriage plans yet, but I think she’s the right one.”
“Speaking of the devil.” Your phone rang, and it was your fiancé, Jiwoong. You were actually waiting around for Jiwoong to finish his meeting when you met Gunwook. Jiwoong called to tell you the meeting was over. “I ran into an old friend. We’re at a cafe now… Okay, I’ll send you the address.”
“Is he coming to pick you up?” He asked as you ended the call.
“Yeah. He’s nearby, so he shouldn’t be long.”
The two of you chatted for a bit longer until Jiwoong arrived.
“I used to ask myself if I would do the same, knowing how much I regretted not telling you how I felt.” You told Gunwook as he accompanied you to Jiwoong’s car. “But then I learnt that sometimes regrets happen to teach us a lesson. It was because of you that I learnt to be more brave in love, Gunwook-ah.”
Without the past with Gunwook, you wouldn’t be who you are now. You knew he would always hold a special place in your heart despite not having feelings for him anymore.
“Maybe we would’ve regretted it even more if we had confessed.” He said lightheartedly, and you both let out a soft chuckle. You exchanged smiles with each other one last time.
“But on a serious note, thank you, too, for being in my life, Y/N. High school was a time filled with amazing memories because of you.”
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