✿————✦————✿
Mathew: Hello all, it is I, your favorite person.
Hanbin: Actually, Hao is my favourite.
Mathew: Okay then, it is I, that bitch.
✿————✦————✿
Hao, pointing to Gyuvin and Hanbin: Distract them! I’ll be right back! *leaves*
Ricky: Okay!
*five minutes later*
Hao: *returns and sees Gyuvin and Hanbin unconscious on the ground* What did you do? I said distract them, not knock them out!
Ricky: There’s just no pleasing you sometimes.
✿————✦————✿
Mathew: I don’t dab. I stab.
✿————✦————✿
Jiwoong: Hey.
Mathew: Hey?
Jiwoong: I can’t sleep. :/
Mathew: I can. Goodnight.
✿————✦————✿
Mathew: I’ve connected the two dots.
Hao: You didn’t connect shit.
Mathew: I’ve connected them.
✿————✦————✿
Ricky: I don’t even have time to tell you how wrong you are.
Yujin: Okay?
Ricky: …
Ricky: …
Ricky: Actually it’s gonna bug me if I don’t, so—
✿————✦————✿
Cop: What are your names?
Gunwook: Don’t tell them, Gyuvin.
Cop, writing: Gyuvin…
Gunwook: Crap.
Gyuvin: Nice going, Gunwook.
Cop:
Gyuvin: Uh oh.
✿————✦————✿
Gunwook, in the groupchat: So you guys robbed Ricky?
Ricky: Yeah, all of them.
Mathew: Lies.
Hanbin: Slander.
Gyuvin: That’s bullshit.
Hao: And we’d do it again.
✿————✦————✿
Taerae: So, what’s it like living with Yujin?
Hao: They once referred to sand as “heterosexual glitter.”
Taerae: …
Hao: I love them so much.
✿————✦————✿
Kidnapper: We have your child
Hanbin: I don’t have a child?
Kidnapper: Then who just asked for warm milk and made us cut the crusts off their sandwich?
Hanbin: Oh god, you have Yujin
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