Jiwoong x Y/N
Angst/ Hurt
GOLDEN Series
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Remind me again – how did things end up like this?
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*An hour ago*
“Gyuvin-ah, Y/N-ah, can you set the table, please?” Mum shouted from the kitchen, asking me and my twin brother to set the table for dinner.
Our eldest sister, Yebin, will be bringing her boyfriend home for dinner tonight. He will be meeting the whole family for the first time, so everyone’s pretty excited to meet the guy who Unnie wouldn’t shut up about the last few months. Whenever we asked her for a photo, however, she tried to keep it secretive and mysterious.
“He’s probably very ugly. That’s why you wouldn’t even show us a photo of him.” Gyuvin would often tease.
“Just wait till you see him in person.” Yebin, who was not provoked at all, just calmly responded.
Yebin is in her junior year of college, while me and Gyuvin are in our freshman year; there’s a two-year age gap between us. Yebin definitely has the aura of the eldest – confident and clever. She’s the daughter and sister we are all proud of. Hence, someone who would make her go head over heels for must be very outstanding.
Yebin has never brought a boyfriend home, so me and Gyuvin have really different depictions of her dream man. Gyuvin presumed her ideal type to be somewhat muscular and sporty, while I thought she would like someone more intellectual and mature. I guess we will find out the answer real soon.
Gyuvin dashed to open the door as soon as the doorbell rang, and I followed. The door swung open, revealing a lovely couple with their hands held together. Yebin unnie had a shy smile on her face, seeming slightly embarrassed about the situation, especially when Gyuvin immediately started giving her teasing looks.
But my world stopped for a moment when I met eyes with the main character of the night. The bickering sounds between Unnie and Gyuvin faded out. Kim Jiwoong, a man who needed no introduction because he’s my senior in college. Me and Yebin were polar opposites in terms of personality; how was our taste in men exactly the same? To be fair, though, it would be hard to find Jiwoong not attractive. Even Gyuvin started exclaiming out of admiration after he had a look at him.
I caught the shock in his eyes, but before he could say anything, I immediately looked away as a sign of telling him to pretend that we didn’t know each other.
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So here I am at the dinner table, sitting across from my crush, whom I confessed to exactly two months ago. But now he is my sister’s boyfriend.
I could feel him glancing at me from time to time, but I couldn’t bring myself to look him in the eye. I didn’t want to see the guilt and the pity in his eyes, because that would just make me feel even more pathetic.
I barely spoke during the dinner, but luckily, no one gave a damn about me since tonight was all about Yebin and Jiwoong. I tried to block out their conversations, but nothing would stop that piercing pain in my heart. Lovey-dovey scenes of Jiwoong and Yebin kept flashing through my brain, and I was flooded with jealousy. It was even worse when I knew that Yebin was a much better match for him – a perfect man deserved a perfect lady.
I scoffed at myself for having tried to confess to this man.
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It’s a hard pill to swallow
This emotion, I bottle
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After dinner, me and Gyuvin went into the kitchen to wash the dishes, while our parents were in the living room chatting with the couple.
“Mum and Dad looked so happy with Jiwoong Hyung. I mean, who wouldn’t? I would probably fall for him too if I were a girl. Even from a guy’s perspective, he’s so cool. It’s a pity he didn’t become an actor with that face.”
“Are you okay?” Gyuvin finally noticed that I’ve been quiet this whole time.
“Just sleepy” was all I managed to say.
Gyuvin was not convinced by my excuse, so he lowered his head to look into my eyes, but I turned my head away.
“Kim Y/N, look at me! What’s wrong?” These are the rare moments when he acts like an older brother – 8 minutes and 30 seconds older, to be exact.
“Just leave me alone for a while. I’ll tell you later.” I didn’t know how he would react to this information, so it was better to keep my mouth shut. Gyuvin was the only one in my family who knew about Jiwoong. Well, who knew that I had a crush, to be clear, he obviously didn’t know that the crush was our sister’s boyfriend.
Gyuvin really just stayed quiet after I told him to. He goofs around most of the time, but he is also a very thoughtful and caring brother.
I decided to be antisocial after coming out from the kitchen, so I went out to the balcony, knowing that Gyuvin would come up with the best excuse to cover me up without putting me in the centre of attention.
I plugged in my headphones, put on a playlist of songs for the heartbroken, and let myself drown in a pool of sadness. After some time, I was interrupted by an uninvited figure, who caught me off guard by standing next to me. I quickly wiped away the tear that slipped down from the corner of my eye and took off my headphones.
“Did I scare you?” Jiwoong said in his deep, husky voice.
“Not my first scare of the day.” I tried to reply in a light-hearted tone.
“Sorry, Y/N. I didn’t know.”
“Would it have made a difference if you knew?”
He would still have fallen in love with my sister. He would still be here tonight to meet my parents. I would still have to go through the pain of seeing them together. There was literally nothing he could have done to minimise the damage.
“Please don’t tell my sister. I don’t want to make things awkward between me and her.”
“I won’t. I hope things won’t get awkward between us too.”
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I was cold, now, I’m freezin’
Stuck in a permanent season
And we both know you’re the reason
I’m not the same as before, I don’t feel anymore
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“Y/N, come and eat fruits.” Gyuvin interrupted the conversation at the perfect timing. “Hyung, you’re here too. Mum has cut us some fruits.”
Gyuvin made sure Jiwoong left the scene before turning to me.
“It was him?” He overheard our conversation and finally linked all the dots together.
Just a look, and he knew.
“Aigoo,” he pulled me into a warm embrace. “Should we go out for a drink? Just the two of us.”
“Now?”
“Yeah, now.”
We told our parents that we were going to the convenience store and left the house, when in fact we were going to a pocha down the road.
“We would be in big trouble if Mum found out we sneaked out to drink.” I was unsure about Gyuvin’s plan.
“Mum’s in too good of a mood to be angry at us. Let’s just go without thinking of the consequences, okay? I’ll say I dragged you out if she wants someone to blame.”
“Is this pity that I’m sensing?”
“Why would I pity you?”
I raised my eyebrows. The answer was pretty obvious.
“This is called affection, not pity. He doesn’t deserve you, Y/N.”
“You were saying all kinds of good things about him just now, and suddenly, he doesn’t deserve me?” I chuckled at how Gyuvin was trying to console me.
“A man who doesn’t see the good in you doesn’t deserve you, no matter how perfect he is.”
I teared up hearing him say that – it wasn’t that I wasn’t enough; he simply wasn’t the right one.
“Uh, uh, don’t you dare to cry here.”
“I’m not crying.” I broke into a smile while wiping away my tears.
“I’ll tell you a secret.” He almost whispered while getting closer. “You’re my all-time favourite sister. Don’t tell Noona.”
“I promise I’ll be fine from tomorrow onwards.” I gave him an appreciative smile.
And he returned an understanding one. We clinked our glasses, and I chugged down the shot of soju in one go before pouring myself another one and another one.
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Need somethin’ strong for the sorrow
Somethin’ strong for the pain
So, I can wash it away
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